If you’re dating an INFJ woman then you are probably starting to learn more about their complexity… and maybe it is proving to be difficult for you. However, here are three things to know when you’re dating an INFJ woman to simplify our minds. Hopefully, it helps for you to better understand how we feel about you and our relationship.

1. We wish that you would truly try to understand how we work, and who we are.

A lot of INFJ’s have an unspoken complexity that is kept very private to them because of several reasons.

• We may have been scarred or hurt by people in our lives. Usually, we seem warm at first, but in reality, we are very private individuals who will only let a certain few into our hearts and minds. If you’re in, you’ll know how amazing it feels to be connected to us.
• We are very cautious of your true intentions. Unless we completely trust you with ourselves, we won’t really let you handle us. However, don’t take this offensively, because it’s how we are to everyone. We need someone who understands the need to be patient and encouraging when we’re trying to get used to you.
• INFJ’s often always felt misunderstood as children or adults, so we feel uncertain of how we are going to get processed by someone new.

2. INFJ women are usually visionary and that makes us somewhat constantly relying on our intuition.

Most likely, if you’re a sensor type, we’ll have a tougher time connecting. Not that it’s impossible (because I eventually have), but usually it’s harder to understand how we process how we think and act. We rely heavily on our feelings and the way we think about our feelings to make a decision which may cause confusion. In reality, we just prefer to analyze the flow of things and to feel what to do, depending on what our mind picks up as being the next best course of action.

Another thing is that often times, our intuition is so strong that we unknowingly expect others to be the same. In reality, it’s the INFJ’s job to realize that not everyone will understand what we REALLY mean. For example, if we see a pot is missing from the cabinet and is clearly used and unclean, we might ask where the pot is… even if it’s right in front of us. We expect the other person to understand that we not only want the pot back where it is needed but also to be cleaned for us to use next. Though this is a simple example, we assume that what we say is enough for you to also think of what we don’t say. We somewhat expect the other person to feel what we mean by the tone of our voice when in reality we could just be more upfront about it (politely please).

3. We are innately curious, wise, and insightful humans. Sometimes we seek for meaning in the smallest of details because we are often looking at the bigger picture that not everyone can understand.

We generally feel the need to connect things together in order to make sense of it. Even if that means finding things to interpret or analyze, we will do it in order for our minds to come to peace with how things are. We were likely to be like this ever since we were a child, being more mature and observant than peers our age. Often this can lead to us feeling a bit egotistical which I will admit is not a good trait. However, most of the times, our insight tells us correct about people and situations. We are also good at giving out advice to others when they are lost or in seek of solace through understanding.

INFJ women are very rare and special in their own ways. We know about our oddness and our adaptability. We appear to have both hot and cold moments, however, we mean the best as long as you treat us well and allow us to truly believe to be there for us. There are a lot of things we bring to the relationship, however, you have to understand how we work first.