After coming back from my little month vacation, I have come to realize three things about myself.
I am more paranoid with washing my hands than I was before
Hand Washing
I always washed my hands to begin with. Every time I would get off the Bearline I would wash my hands or coming back from class I would wash my hands or coming back from the store I would wash my hands. I knew the importance of it and I hate being sick, so the more ways I can avoid being sick, the better. Well since all the COVID stuff has happened, I find myself washing my hands more and more. I took a lot of precautions when I came back from Vegas and I honestly was more paranoid coming back to Missouri because they have had more cases than Vegas. I don't think my hands have been this dry and it is not that I don't use lotion because I do. It is that I was my hands get washed so much that the moisture from my hands really does not stay.
I actually like living in my apartment by myself
Apartment
I live in the campus apartments and I live in a four person apartment. I decided to stay in the apartment because I have the rest of this semester and then summer semester and I am done with my degree! So, since I stayed all my roommates moved out and I am here all by myself. Let me tell you, it has been pretty nice. I can watch and listen to anything I want. I have a clean kitchen and bathroom, I can make as much noise as I want and not have to worry about disturbing anyone, and I have a quiet place to study. I like having the independence of not having to tell anyone where I am going or why I am not going anywhere. It is honestly very peaceful.
I am starting on my path to self-love again
Self-love
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Self-love has always been an issue for me. I believe I am harder on myself than I am with others. Self-love for me has to do with how I see myself and how I love myself, my self image, and knowing my worth. I have recently been trying to put myself back together and it is a very slow and hard process. But, I am doing it. I have been able to workout again and actually go for a run. I can't run for long periods of time, but when I do, it helps me clear my head and it relieves a lot of my stress and anxiety. I have started to eat a lot healthier and make better choices for my body. I can see a difference when I actually put my body first and it feels amazing. I wish self-love was easy and that it would stay, but I know that it is a process and I just have to keep at it because I know in the end, it will be worth it.
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