When that ball dropped on midnight this year, I thought a lot about what my personal resolutions were. Instead of prior years where I listed cliché things such as lose weight, get better grades and save money, I began to think deeper on what I feel are some things that are often, unfortunately, overlooked but necessary for personal well-being.
Here are the top three things that I learned in 2016 I wanted to pursue for my resolutions this new year:
1. Don't let anyone get away with making you feel like your emotions are invalid.
YOU MATTER. Whether you are feeling insecure in a relationship and need to address an important issue, are excited about a new accomplishment that you want to scream from the mountaintops or are battling a state of depression and uncertainty that leaves you needing a shoulder to cry on, please always keep in mind that you are human. For anyone in your life to downplay how you're feeling, or take away your innate right to express these emotions, is a complete overstep in boundaries and invasion of autonomy. Be gentle and understanding with yourself, and don't believe anyone who tries to make you feel like you are inadequate for your self awareness and natural instinctive state of mind.
2. Don't settle for half ass relationships.
Whether it be someone you're interested in that refuses to commit or a forced friendship, you deserve people in your life that don't make you second guess when it comes to where you stand with them. You deserve people that are sure of you and are proud to be a part of your journey—no exceptions or excuses. Relationships that are more exhausting than beneficial are ones that aren't worth having. Having anything halfway is more painful than having nothing at all. Respect yourself enough to only make room for quality connections with quality individuals that nourish your soul through and through. You will notice a difference in all aspects of your life when you upgrade who you surround yourself with. You owe it to yourself.
3. Don't lose sight of what truly matters.
As easy as it can be to get caught up in what society pushes on us as being the "most important" aspects of our life—college, work, money—none of it compares to the moments that make our lives worth living. The goal in life isn't to stress and work as hard as you can until your last day, and the greatest regret that you will have is to put the trivial and synthetic things above memories that are intangible and irreplaceable with those that are closest to you. So, stop at your grandparents house every time you come home from college and have morning coffee instead of sleeping until noon. Don't feel guilty about dedicating your weekends to your best friends instead of picking up that extra shift. Call your parents every chance you get, even if that means putting the books down for a few hours just to visit and make their day. More money can be made, and a grade can be raised, but the time spent with loved ones can't be made up for once it's gone. Don't sacrifice this precious gift over the small stuff.
I challenge you to reach inside and find the core of what has held you back or hurt you in 2016 and make your top three list as well: a fresh start and a shift in mindset. Let's take 2017 by storm.