The Three Most Important Things That My Dad Taught Me | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

The Three Most Important Things That My Dad Taught Me

53
The Three Most Important Things That My Dad Taught Me

This is not a traditional post about being a “daddy’s girl” or “his little princess.”

Why? Simply put, I don’t have a dad.

Sure, there was a guy I am biologically related to that somewhat raised me until I was about 4, but due to many complications and hardships that I don’t want to get into, my parents divorced when I was about 5. I grew up with him being in and out of my life. I grew up with the flakiness of a middle aged man trying to get to know me, and then misusing my trust and leaving again.

I grew up having to emotionally provide for myself a lot.

I felt forced to make very adult decisions at a very young age.

I grew up knowing and experiencing brokenness in marriage.

I grew up without an earthly example of my heavenly father.

I grew up in a single-parent home.

I grew up without financial support from my dad or emotional ease.

I don’t know what it is like to have a “dad”.

That doesn’t mean that he didn’t teach me anything, though. Believe it or not, I learned a lot from him and have become a much stronger person because of where he lacked and his unreliability.

1. You cannot fix someone.

My parents once loved each other and mom thought her love could provide the emotional support that he needed. How I understand it is that she thought her love could fix his problems. She tried, but it couldn’t.

Because I am stubborn, I have decided to observe this concept, put the issue to practice, and try figure it out for myself. It was unnecessary, but the lesson is really cemented into my brain now.

You cannot fix someone who does not want to be fixed or thinks that they don’t need fixing.

From my perspective which has been molded by my faith, we are all broken and bruised. We all need fixing because, without Christ, we are utterly shattered and un-mendable. However, God is the perfect healer and lover of our souls; but not everyone believes in this. Many are unaware of their depravity and need for a Savior. Sometimes all we can do is pray and love from a distance.

My challenge for you: let go! Don’t keep holding onto his or her burdens because you think you can carry them. You will get burnt out and they probably will be so used to carrying around their burdens that they won’t give them to you.

Also, let go of holding on to your parent’s divorce. It is not your fault.

2. Forgiveness is so sweet.

Let’s be real, forgiveness sucks sometimes. It’s really hard. It’s especially hard when you’ve finally allowed yourself to forgive someone and when you try to tell them your progress, they admit that they feel as if they have done nothing to hurt you. That really sucks.

Oftentimes, forgiveness is a “pick up your cross daily” type of process. Just because you have forgiven them once doesn’t mean you won’t have to forgive them again tomorrow due to the realization that you’re still harboring bitterness towards them.

Forgiveness is a journey and very good journey has a destination. The end destination in the journey of forgiveness is peace.

I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing it feels to forgive someone and not feel anger towards them anymore. Everyone uses the expression, “It’s like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders!” We hear this all of the time, and I’m going to be honest, sometimes I think that the phrase sounds so cliche. I won’t lie to you, either. When you forgive someone, it will literally feel like you're 10 pounds lighter. I kid you not; go try it out and get back to me in a few years.

My challenge for you: go loose weight! (Not literally, your body is beautiful). Go forgive someone and actually commit to forgiving them. You will feel the weight lifted off of your shoulders.

3. Don’t place your value in people.

Don’t put your full faith in earthly people or things. I’m not saying this because I hate people or think that you should be skeptical, never allowing yourself to become close to anyone; that is completely untrue.

What I’m saying is to not find your validation in the things of the world.

I love my friends and family, I trust them with my life, and I want to be closer to them. However, I do not define my worth by their words or actions and they should not find their worth in me.

We ought to find our worth in God. He is all and will be forever. He never disappoints. He is always faithful and reliable. He defines our value because He is the standard of worth.

My challenge for you: find your value in God! Point those who need forgiveness to Christ so that they can also find their worth in the Lord.

Just because my earthly father was not in my life does not mean that he didn’t teach me anything. His absence drew me to a greater dependency on Christ and showed me that this world will fail, but the Lord will not!

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
nothing on to-do list

Winter break is a cherished time for many after enduring a grueling fall semester. It’s a time of relaxation and time spent with loved ones over the holidays. However, once the new year rolls around, we’re all ready to go back to school. Here are thoughts every college student has during winter break.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

10 Facts All People In A Large Family Can Confirm During The Holiday Season

The holiday season can be the best and most stressful time of the year, especially when more people are involved.

2538
kids jumping

The holidays are full of lights, sweets, sweaters, and your favorite movies. There's nothing quite like this period from the beginning of December through January. Christmas, Hanukkah, and New Years. The fun of it all.

I don't know about you but with my large Italian family something is always going on during this season. It can be the most wonderful time of the year while also being the most hectic. These are a few things you know if your family is anything like mine during this time.

Keep Reading...Show less
10 things that happen the second Thanksgiving is over
reference.com

To those who celebrate, you just spent an entire day cooking an elaborate meal with all of your favorite foods. You probably ate your body weight in pumpkin pie and mashed potatoes. What happens now? Oh yea, Christmas. It’s time to take out all of the decorations and Christmas themed things that have been sitting in the attic since last year; it’s time to make a reappearance. So, here are 10 things that happen the second Thanksgiving is over.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

18 Things I Want To Do Now That I'm 18

I'm technically an adult, so I'm legally required to live a little, right?

5228
Happy Birthday Cake

For the entirety of my high school career, I was always seen as the goody-two-shoes. I never got in trouble with a teacher, I kept stellar grades, and when I wasn't doing extracurricular activities, I was at home studying. Even when I did go out, it was usually with a bunch of fellow band geeks. The night would end before 11:00 PM and the only controversial activity would be a fight based on who unfairly won a round of Apples-to-Apples when someone else clearly had a better card (I promise I'm not still holding a grudge).

Now that I'm officially an adult, I want to pursue some new things. I want to experience life in a way that I never allowed myself to do prior to entering college. These are the years that I'm supposed to embark on a journey of self-discovery, so what better way to do that than to create a bucket list?

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics

The holiday classics that shaped my life

3239
10 Life Lessons from Christmas Classics
Flickr

The holiday season is full of stress, debt, and forced conversation. While we rush through the month of December, it's important to take a step back and enjoy the moments before they're gone. Most families love to watch Christmas movies, but these beloved films provide more than entertainment. Here are 10 life lessons that I've learned from the holiday classics we watch every year.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments