When I was looking at my calendar today, I was shocked not only by the fact that school would be starting soon, but also for how time flied. Personally, 2017 was the most challenging, yet most fruitful year of my life. Lots of unexpected things happened; life started with a new chapter (I transferred to a new school with a quiet different location). People walked in and out my life. Mixed with joy and tears, this was also the year that I grew up most. Here are three important lessons that I’d like to share with everyone about what I learned besides academics.

1. Never push yourself too hard

I’m the “very strict” type to myself which means I need to achieve perfection for everything. If I don’t get As on assignments or put up only several weights, I would be really frustrated and even engage in some punishing activities. It’s true that people should have self-regulation and motivations, but I pushed myself to an extreme unhealthy level. When I was taking a personality psychology last semester, we learned about “self.” We all have “id” and “ego” - the conflict between one’s desire and reality. There’s a certain point when your “id” (desire) is over-suppressed, which will finally lead to a compelete explosion. That’s balancing between work/study and life is important. Do something that you simply enjoy doing other than what you’re required to do.

2. Don’t depend on other people

It’s important to know that you are living your own life. When you rely on someone too much, it’s easy to lose who you are and even the direction you’re heading to. Though you can ask other people for advice, you still need to make final decisions based on your own evaluations/judgments.

3. Don’t live in the past

Though uncontrollable or unpredictable things happen all the time, when they’re over, it’s time to move on. I know it’s hard sometimes, especially for all the time/emotional engagement. But when there’s no way to go back and solve the problem, it’s better to move on. What we can and should do is seeing this as a valuable learning opportunity and not make the same mistake in the future.