Much like most children that were raised by generous and caring parents, I grew up to be a considerate young adult. I spent my childhood displaying good manners, respecting my elders, and giving people the benefit of the doubt in sticky situations. I spent my teenage years in the same fashion, yet I found myself wanting to push the boundaries of the basis of my whole being. Nonetheless, I continued on with what I grew up knowing. As I got older, however, I realized I was far more accommodating to others needs than I maybe should be. I asked myself, "Am I living a life to make others happy?" In my head, I was questioning myself like I never had before. Was I censoring myself to make others more comfortable? Was I conforming to others values and beliefs? These were questions that frightened me to no end, so I told myself it was time to change. Call me inexperienced, entitled or naive if you want—I still knew deep down that it was time to be young and live for myself.
Now let's not mistake this for narcissism. I fully understand what older generations think of Millennials—we're the "Me Me Me Generation." What they don't know is that I still look out for my good friends and family, I volunteer when I can, and I'm still giving back. I am not, however, going to let people walk all over me. Maybe it was a bit of a self-centered movement I was about to join, but the thought of continuing a life that served others far more than I served myself was even scarier than embarking on this journey. Was it fair to continue putting others first while my own psyche was drowning in bullshit trying to spare the feelings of others? I quivered at the idea of this new journey, but I thought, "If not now, when?" Seriously, if not when you're 20 years old, when?
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So there I was with a new perspective and a newfound motivation that was sure to brighten up my present and in turn better my future. I'm not going to tell you that this journey is completed. I still find myself putting others needs ahead of my own, which isn't always necessarily a bad thing. I needed to change simply for the fact that I needed to figure out a purpose for my own life. If I was always putting others first, how was I ever going to fulfill my own dreams?
Although life as a 20-something is scary with all of its ups and downs, this is the time of life where you are allowed to change, grow, and shape yourself into what you're meant to be for the rest of your life. It is the time in your life where you are meant to make mistakes and not have to apologize to anyone for straying down the "wrong" path. It is the time that you should be selfish because you have to live with yourself and the decisions you make at this age for the rest of your life.
Life as a 20-something should not be sparing others feelings to bypass friction and differing ideas. Life as a 20-something should not be tying yourself down to one idea and one path. Life as a 20-something should not be repeating the lives of your parents because its all you've ever known.
Life as we know it right now should be exploring and wandering with no specified outcome. It should be flexible. It should be remembering your roots, but respecting your ever-changing mind enough to know that steering away from those roots and pushing boundaries is allowed. It should be broadening your horizons and trying new things.
So be selfish, and live your life specifically for you right now. Please, use this time to be young.
