You've already started, but you're not quite finished. You're reaching your breaking point, but it's only the halfway point. It's midterms, my friends. Here are some thoughts we've all had at this point of the semester.

"I'll start going to the gym tomorrow."

Yeah, right.

"I think I'll start working on that paper due tomorrow, too."

...that you've known about since syllabus week.

"Is it too late to drop this class?"

...or out of college? Just a question.

"If the first half didn't kill me, surely the second half will."

Because you came pretty close to it a number of times.

"I should start limiting the days I go out."

But not by much. Just 6 days a week. Totally a compromise.

"Maybe my professor will offer me extra credit."

When are his office hours again? Also, what is his name?

"When is Fall Break?"

Only one more week!

"When is Thanksgiving Break?"

Only one more month!

"When is Christmas break?"

"When is summer break?"

Oh, wait, I have to take that one class I failed again...

"I finally got more than four hours of sleep!"

Maybe my roommate will actually talk to me now.

"I need to calculate the minimum grade I can earn to pass this class."

If I get a 65, then that's higher than my lowest test grade, so the extra credit will apply and...

"Who is hiring around here?"

My summer babysitting money is running low.

"C's earn degrees, right?"

But hopefully they'll settle for a D.

"I think I'm just gonna take a nap."

So I can sleep the next half away. Wake me at Christmas.