A piece of my summer philosophy:
“You’re climbing up a mountain,” a wise pastor once told me. I wanted to quit my summer job.
Sometimes I lock myself in my room and hold my heart in my hands. I examine all it’s colors. It’s a little broken, a little blue. Tonight it feels heavy. I’m carrying the weight of my responsibilities, loss of loved ones, and the burdens of the people around me. It’s exhausting. Maybe you can relate? Maybe you feel like you’re constantly juggling all the negativity in your life and you can never get a break. Maybe you keep asking yourself, when is it going to end?
Altogether, I think sometimes it’s easy to complain about everything that’s going wrong. It’s easy to stare up at the mountain in front of you and tell yourself things like: “I can’t do this.”
“Ain’t nobody got time to climb this mountain.”
“I’m not about that mountain life.”
“Who put that mountain there??”
“God, you shouldn’t have put a mountain in front of me. I’m a good person, I don’t deserve this mountain. Why would you do this to me? Where are you? Are you even listening?”
It’s easy to blame God.
Sometimes I see my friends posting on Facebook the great place they’ve been, the wonders of this earth that they’ve seen. They can summit a mountain much taller and more dangerous than mine, on the daily, effortlessly. It makes me super jelly jelly doughnut, and super discouraged because my mountain seems impossible to get past.
I’ll even find myself making progress sometimes, and just as I gain the energy to conquer the world, I trip on something small and plant my face in the rocks.
I think things like: “This could have easily been avoided if I just did it differently.”
“I should’ve seen this coming.”
“Maybe I deserve it.”
It’s easy to feel inadequate.
Then one day, I just gave up. I failed and I quit. I went to talk to my boss and told him, “Pastor I don’t want to be here anymore. I want to go home.” I told him everything I was struggling with. Pastors are so easy to confide in. I encourage you to find a pastor and tell him your life story. It’s like, in their nature to want to help you.
He said something like, “At the end of this journey you’re going to look back down at the mountain you overcame and say, ‘I did it.’”
I am not going to miss out on that moment. This thought was the turning point for me because I realized that the only reason my friends can say "I reached the summit" is because they pushed themselves.The key to success is trial. And once you realize that, you can understand that the journey is the part you learn from, not the destination. Otherwise, what are you succeeding? What makes that last step on the top of the mountain special, is every step before that. You should listen to The Climb by Miley Cyrus. On the last day of working here, I'm going to say, "I made it." Being there on the last day means, I was strong enough to overcome the obstacles put in my way. Then I realized, it wasn’t God who put them there in the first place.
Instead, God was the one who told me, Babygirl, if your heart is too heavy for you to carry, I can take it for you (Matt. 11:2).
He is the one who tells me: You are strong enough to overcome this obstacle (1Cor 10:13), and if you don’t want to believe that, believe Me when I say, I can be strong for you. You don’t have to be strong enough. You don’t even have to climb the mountain. Look see, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you (Matthew 17:20).
This message hit me right in the feels this summer, and I just wanted to share it with you. -^_^- I’m not super good at expressing my thoughts verbally, but I channel that passion into my artwork.
“You’re climbing up a mountain,” he said to me.
I want to encourage you to tell yourself this whenever you’re caught between “pushing through” or “giving yourself a break.” Next time you feel like collapsing, run faster. Whenever you feel like you're in chains, remember you are free. Break through the walls you feel trapped inside. Love recklessly. God restores.