Dear future Carly,
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2016 been a wild ride. Much of the year felt like suffering from motion sickness. You could feel the earth spinning on its axis, time propelling you further in to the future and it made you want to hurl. Still, it was quite the time to be alive. As you were stepping out of childhood, so was the rest of the world. Gradually conversations became less hypothetical, as you saw the world changing in real time. No one was pointing out the window saying “Look kids history!” Instead, it was all you, seeing everything with a priemptive nostalgia. You constantly caught yourself wondering, how am I going to remember this? This was somewhat expected. After all, it was your first semester of collage, your first presidential election, your first time living in a dorm and having a roommate, and all of the other standard novelties. But there were other changes too, ones that frankly, no one was prepared for. They shook you, but I have the feeling that youre going to be stronger for it.
You learned a lot about yourself this year. You cut a lot of ties with people you thought would be around forever. True, there are more sour memories than you anticipated, but sweet ones too. There were a lot of moments when you were tempted to abandon your convictions for the sake of politeness, moments you considered piroritizing being liked over being you. But you did an excellent job in practicing authenticity, even if it meant putting yourself in uncomfortable situations. You’ve come to peace with a lot of truths. For instance, the fact that you really are an exceptional nerd. Not just the charming, quirky, Im-so-cute-and-awkward kind of nerdy, but the burst-in-to-tears-over-wordsworth kind of nerdy. And that’s alright. Because you’ve also learned that you are totally okay with paying off massive student loans for the sake of learning. This first semester of collage took you back to when you were a little kid learning for learnings sake. Your ocillations between optimism and pesimism have narrowed, and for the most part, you’ve come to believe that the world is basically good (despite events that may suggest otherwise).
You’ve gained confidence and I predict that this will take you far in the coming year. In 2017 take deep breaths, practice patience and mindfullness, and go with what feels good, even if it’s not pragmatic (now is the time for protected risks afterall). Take pride in your work, because more often than not it’s better than you think. Indulge in silliness, because growing up is a myth. Read tarot cards with your friends because part of you will always get a thrill from the possibility that magic is real. Read books for fun, not just credit. Take long walks, because they always make you feel better. And don’t think so much, because there’s a lot to take in, and you don’t want to miss it.
