We've all heard the saying "Friends come and go," but what about those friendships that you thought weren't going anywhere? What do you do when someone who you thought was a true friend leaves you in a time of need? There are no answers on what to do, only words to say to the friend who left. And if you think I am talking about you, then I probably am.
To the friend who purposely left my side when I needed you the most, I still care about you. I still wish the very best for you and the memories of us still make me smile inside. I wish no harm to you. I want to know how you could be so cold as to leave, though? I want you to know that you leaving my side made me feel worthless and lonely. You took me to a darker place than I already was in. You made me feel worthless and turned a part of me cold. You were my person to turn to, my emergency contact. I thought you were in it for the long run, but I guess that's my bad. I thought we were closer than we were and you taught me to now hold distance with friendships; thank you for that. You discreetly left my side, which I would argue is the worst way to do so. You left me wondering what I did wrong, what I did to make you so mad that you just left. Knowing if I brought it up, you would play the victim. You made me question what was wrong with me. You ghosted me like a shady ex would do, but you weren't a shady ex-boyfriend; you were a friend that I trusted with my life.
I hope when you read this it sparks emotions and makes you question things the way I did. Losing a friend isn't easy. It's easier than ending a relationship, but there is still a part of you that goes when that friend goes. What I found in this mess is that there are warning signs that you have a toxic friend, and I ignored them with you. You didn't want to help, you felt compelled to help. You didn't like inviting me out to places, only when you felt compelled. And that's not a friend. You were never a friend. I was someone to pass the time with until you found your place, and although I wish you no harm, I hope the same happens to you some day so you understand the pain it feels to not have anyone to turn to in a time of need.