Whether it's your first Holiday season or third, like mine without a certain loved one, the holidays are still a different season than the ones before. My friend, you are not alone.
You miss them.
You want things as they were before.
This is natural. But at times, it sure doesn't seem to be livable.
So what can you do? The whole situation feels completely out of your hands and for the most part it really is. I know what you're thinking, okay then why am I reading this? It's for the choice you do have. You don't choose grief, you don't choose timing and you don't choose loss, but you do get the choice of how you deal with the circumstances around you.
The who, when, where and what are answered, but the why question may be your dark shadow. I admit it has been mine, especially during the holidays.
Why my dad?
Why so soon...
Why not this or why that?!
The thing I had to come to terms with that I want to share with you, where your choice comes into play is this... you choose to answer the main question you have. The why question.
Proverbs 3:5-6 says, "TRUST in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path's straight." (NASB translation)
Trust and lean not on your own understanding.
I might not know why. I might not understand, but I wasn't promised that I would always understand. I am, however, given the choice to trust.
To trust that despite the pain and inspite of the answers not being given, I have to choose. No one else has this power but me. This is something I control.
When I realized I have this power, Me and no one else, the pain didn't go away but it let me give the pain to the One who promised to hold me, help me and keep me in His loving hands.
That is the choice. That is what I choose that although I don't get it, I don't understand, I know the One who does and that is what matters.
Isaiah 41:10 says, "Do not be afraid, for I AM with you. Do not be discouraged for I AM your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with My righteous right hand." (NLT translation)
This is the point where you get to choose that the "why" may never be answered but trust that despite that His love hasn't changed. His plan is still perfect despite the broken world around us. He still holds you.
This is the question I place to you instead of why. Who is it that understands your pain, your situation and your need but God?
I declare this in my life and I pray you may know this peace that does not coming with understanding but trusting the One who cares more for you this second than anyone else can. Psalm 16:8 is my declaration that I hope you take as your own. "I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With Him at my right hand, I will not be shaken." (NIV translation)
Peace is not a gift that comes with understanding. Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." (NIV translation)
You will still feel pain, but you can walk in peace that no matter what, He is here holding and loving you always. Trust in Him today and ask for peace only He can give.