As I picked up the phone, I can tell my friend Carl was upset about something. His voice was abnormal from normal phone calls we usually would have. His breath was hard and it was tough for him to say anything or be calm. I said “Carl! Relax bro, what’s going on, why you sound so upset?”. He finally caught his breath and all he said was listen bro, I have something to share with you about D... I wrote something this morning that I was feeling and I need you to hear it. while Carl was talking I listened and this is what he said.
Today was the day
Where my life would take a turn
Positively or negatively
Where everything was supposed to change
For the rest or for the worst.
I had two options
Turn left and go backwards, turn right and keep going in circles.
Out somehow the strength in me found an alternate route, go straight and keep moving forward.
Waited all day by the phone
For an important phone call.
Each ring was a deception.
My mind start to spin
Wishing and praying to god
To not let today be the worst.
Feeling the need of being wanted
Having the feeling of not being enough
Forcing myself into my work
To forget all the good and bad moments. As much as it hurts to let go
Nothing hurts more than being unwanted and unappreciated.
Then feeling of being taken for granted.
How could I have been so blind
Telling myself all of those lies to comfort my egoism.
I don’t blame you for my downfall
But I blame myself for destroying my own personal integrity.
I found myself evanescing, trailing behind.
This was when I decided that I was enough
My heart has taking a beating
A beating that will be hard to recover from.
I’ve treated my heart like a brothel lusting and yeaning.
Now my heart has been broken into million pieces
Shattered all across the floor, gathering the pieces.
Afraid to let go
Afraid to move on
Not knowing what lies ahead
Making a decision is tough.
The challenges we face
Makes us stronger.
Moving on is scary.
We think of the worst
Instead on the best.
Sometimes the worst
Can become the best.
