This one is for you.

You’re getting a whole article dedicated to you, but I wouldn’t let it go to your head.

So don’t feel special.

I just wanted to let you know what I really thought of you. Like, really, truly, unapologetically, whole-heartedly thought of you. So here it goes, sweetie.

You. Are. An A**. Sorry, not sorry. If I don’t tell you, then who will? If I had a dollar for every time you’ve lied, I would have four Brazilian men fanning me while feeding me pizza on my yacht. But unfortunately, all your lies leave me with is frustration…and no pizza. Your constant mind games aren’t any fun. I’ve always enjoyed games, so it’s a shame. But your game makes me exhausted, and I’m choosing to “tap” out. You act as a selfish child who takes others toys and refuses to share. So, I think its time I took back my Matchbox Cars and give you a stick. And I hope that stick breaks into a thousand little pieces.

I feel as if you are a clown. Not the funny good kind… or the ones that hide in the woods. But the one that does this great performance and makes the audience laugh. And then backstage, you talk about how stupid the audience is for laughing at such a silly thing. But all the while, we loved the performance…and the clown.

I’m not going to waste my time with people who are still stuck in old ways. I will MC Hammer my way out of your life so “You Can’t Touch This.” But don’t worry, I’m sure you will find some reason to message me or call me. Probably when you need your ego stroked or you feel like being a character in a movie based off of some Nicholas Sparks novel. By the way, your script is showing out of your back pocket. Unfortunately I will probably always respond because there will be a very tiny, miniscule part of me that believes you will have changed. It’s the little things in life that count, right?

But, seriously, eventually, all of this won’t matter. I will be married to a tan Aussie man and have kangaroos as children. Or, I could be married to someone who actually gives a damn. The possibilities are endless when you just believe, or I guess just letting go of what’s holding you back.

Sorry, not sorry.

This one was for you.