I think, well, I know the need for external approval starts when we’re young, very young. During our toddler years, our guidance comes from our parents. They dress us. They feed us. They school us. All of this is to their approval. In later years, usually when we are school age, the influence of our parents lessens. Parental influence is often undermined or replaced by peer influence. We start to look to our counterparts for what’s acceptable and what’s shunned. Then, sometimes unquestioningly, we mimic the trends. We adopt the crowd mentality.

Of course, many of us would quickly argue that we do things solely for our own approval, and no one else’s matters. This is a lie. Well, it’s not a lie, so much it is a complication. For most, the intention is to positively influence at least one in the crowd. However, to influence one would mean to meet the approval of that one. This means challenging the crowd, and its mentality. That’s the complication. How does one gain approval, and not get lost in the crowd?

Arguably, the most defining moment is when an individual is ridiculed by the crowd. Whether he or she is mocked because of beliefs or simply because of attire, it sparks self-evaluation. The moment of ridicule is the first time many individuals will constructively question themselves. What or who is influencing me? Why do I consider it or them important? Why am I doing this? What does this actually mean to me? This is the moment an individual decides whether he or she will extend or break the crowd mentality. He or she will either remain a complacent follower or emerge as an uncompromising leader. Ironically, in either case, the crowd was the influence.