Things I Won't Miss About College | The Odyssey Online
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Things I Won't Miss About College

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Things I Won't Miss About College

Graduating college is bittersweet. I have very conflicting feelings regarding the fact that in a few short weeks I will be leaving Trinity forever. Half of the time I can't wait to get the hell out of this godforsaken place. The other half of the time I seriously consider purposely failing out of one of my classes so I have another year to figure out my life before I have to adult. I don't know anything about 401ks. I haven't got the faintest idea when you're supposed to change the oil in your car. I can barely muster up the nerve to call the dentist to make an appointment for myself.

The sappy side of me usually overpowers my desire to leave and never look back. I am an extremely nostalgic person; every time I walk through the concrete jungle and spy my freshman year dorm window on the second floor of Wheaton my heart swells with affection for this damn school and the people who made these past four years the best years of my life.

So, in order to prepare myself for the impending emotional adventure that will be senior week, I’ve decided to make a list of the things I will not miss about college. I will refer back to this list whenever I feel distraught about leaving.

1. My roommate Kate taking every possible opportunity to leap out of nowhere and scare the living daylights out of any poor unsuspecting person who crosses her path

I have personally witnessed her hide in one of my roommate’s closet for hours just waiting for her to arrive home. Her dedication is frightening.

2. Sprinting out my door at 9:22 in a futile effort to make it to my 9:25 on time

I should probably set my alarm earlier than 9:20, but you can't win 'em all.

3. Having to struggle to lift my feet off the floor in the kitchen and common room because everyone and their mother spilled drinks all over the place

It doesn't matter how many times we mop, the ground is perpetually sticky. It's like walking through molasses.

4. My roommates threatening to burn me at the stake for constantly turning the thermostat up

It's unnatural how cold they want it to be in our house. I feel like I'm living in an ice box.

5. Class presentations

Who decided that standing up and speaking coherent sentences in front of a classroom full of people should be a thing? Because I have a few words I want to say to that person.

6. The dreadful state of the trash cans on my back porch

I don't know if we have raccoons rifling through our trash or if we just suck at properly tying things up in bags and neatly putting them in the trash cans, but every time I walk out my back door I wonder what fresh hell awaits me on the other side. I've seen stray pieces of burnt toast strewn across the doormat, eighteen empty pizza boxes haphazardly tossed in a heap, and ant covered chicken nuggets laying next to the recycling bin. At this point I could walk out and see a dead body on the back porch and I'd barely bat an eye.

7. Writing bibliographies

We're never going to have to write a bibliography ever again. Just let that sink in for a moment.

Unless, of course, you're going to grad school in which case please disregard this.

Or if you intend on writing a scholarly article or book at some point in your life.

Or if you decide to have children and they happen to ask for your help with writing bibliographies.

So actually I take this back, I can't promise that you will never have to write a bibliography ever again. But, if you put your mind to it I'm sure you could avoid it.

8. The Tap

I know, blasphemous. But if I never stepped foot in the Tap ever again I would not be brokenhearted about it.

9. Hearing people talk about their thesis or where they went abroad

We get it.

(But also, good for you for writing a thesis you beautiful and intelligent human beings)

10. Mixed drinks that I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy

I have had my fair share of terrible mixed drinks over the years. In times of desperation I've mixed water with tequila, iced tea with Fireball, and Starbucks frappuccinos with cookie dough vodka. That one was a low point in my life.


Although college isn't all sunshine and butterflies, leaving Trinity will be difficult. There are some things that I can claim I won't miss, but probably will all the same. I say now that I won't miss be woken up by my roommates returning home at an ungodly hour and hearing the familiar noise of the stereo system in the common room turning on while I'm lying in bed cursing myself for not getting a single. But I know for a fact that I will miss instantly receiving a text that simply says "NO" from the roommate whose room is next to mine every time that does happen. And I can pretend all I want that I won't miss the food, or the people I would rather avoid, or TrinAir, but if I were to say all that I would just be lying to myself. I'd even go so far to say that I'll kinda miss trekking to class in the middle of a blizzard. Kinda.

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