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Things to do Once You're Back in Eastchester

ahhhhhhh didn't you not miss is at all?!

Dec 13, 2016

Things to do Once You're Back in Eastchester

We have arrived, and we're back to the same old shenanigans. My fellow EHood (I'm using that term ironically) alum, if you've forgotten how Christmas break goes, here's a little reminder ...

1. Slave to the Grind

my home again from home <3

2. Scarsdale Langes salad bar

3. Bronxville Langes

Bronco wrap, duh

4. Buonamici

I’m drooling at the thought...

5. PIZZA, CRESTWOOD PIZZA!!!

Guido delivery boy included ;)

Also included: this picture of me before I inahaled this perfect slice of heaven.

6. Lord & Taylor shoe sale

7. Dodge eye contact with people from high school while in the Lord & Taylor shoe department

8. Dodge eye contact with people from high school while in the Lord & Taylor makeup department

9. Dodge eye contact with people from high school while in the Lord & Taylor perfume department

I know at least 15 people who are paid by Lord & Taylor to spray Alien on a small slip of paper and unenthusiastically ask if you’d like to try it.

10. Drop everything you’ve picked up and storm out of Lord & Taylor because you’re sick of failing to dodge eye contact and YOU JUST CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE

11. Make your parents wait on you hand and foot, personally delivering coffee from #1 to your couch

12. You know you’ll end up at the Westchester mall at some point

13. Go to some below-average White Plains bar and get drunk enough to tolerate people from your hometown

14. Probably see your Italian teacher in a Starbucks

This one comes from real life experience.

15. If you’re lucky, run into the legendary Ms. Miller in Stop and Shop

Also real life experience.

16. Hug the very few people you like from home, reminisce about football games and the player’s club and jazz co and prom and that one good looking English teacher, then drink yourself into an oblivion and try to block an entire 4 year period from your memory

17. Avoid Mickey Spillane’s as though it were the plague

You may lose this to a persistent friend who is content with dragging you while you kick and scream down White Plains road.

18. Try to ignore all of the “Make America Great Again” lawn signs

19. Try not to deface all of the “Make America Great Again” lawn signs

20. Count down the days until you’re back at your school, only to find that maaaaybe you miss home

...only maybe

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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Recommended for you

Things to do Once You're Back in Eastchester

ahhhhhhh didn't you not miss is at all?!

1. Slave to the Grind

2. Scarsdale Langes salad bar

3. Bronxville Langes

4. Buonamici

5. PIZZA, CRESTWOOD PIZZA!!!

6. Lord & Taylor shoe sale

7. Dodge eye contact with people from high school while in the Lord & Taylor shoe department

8. Dodge eye contact with people from high school while in the Lord & Taylor makeup department

9. Dodge eye contact with people from high school while in the Lord & Taylor perfume department

10. Drop everything you’ve picked up and storm out of Lord & Taylor because you’re sick of failing to dodge eye contact and YOU JUST CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE

11. Make your parents wait on you hand and foot, personally delivering coffee from #1 to your couch

12. You know you’ll end up at the Westchester mall at some point

13. Go to some below-average White Plains bar and get drunk enough to tolerate people from your hometown

14. Probably see your Italian teacher in a Starbucks

15. If you’re lucky, run into the legendary Ms. Miller in Stop and Shop

16. Hug the very few people you like from home, reminisce about football games and the player’s club and jazz co and prom and that one good looking English teacher, then drink yourself into an oblivion and try to block an entire 4 year period from your memory

17. Avoid Mickey Spillane’s as though it were the plague

18. Try to ignore all of the “Make America Great Again” lawn signs

19. Try not to deface all of the “Make America Great Again” lawn signs

20. Count down the days until you’re back at your school, only to find that maaaaybe you miss home

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Because have you ever had to endure grilling your foot on a George Foreman?

1. When he just wanted bacon from his George Foreman grill

2. When he had money (and Jan) issues

3. When he got upstaged at Phyllis' wedding

4. When he unintentionally saved Meredith from rabies

5. When he wore a "bisexual" suit

6. When he had to apologize to Jesus

7. When his GPS drove him into a lake

8. When he had to deal with Ryan as his boss

9. When he couldn't fulfill his most generous empty promise

10. When this happened

11. When he struggled with a X-Mas break up

12. When he had to defend his generosity

13. When he threw a classy Christmas party for Holly but she had a boyfriend

14. When he had to stand up to peer pressure

15. When Toby was "Toby-ish"

This isn't just for the single Pringles out there either, folks

Run Around Clanging Pots and Pans in Everyone's Face

Eat the Last Few Pigs in a Blanket

Pop Twelve White Grapes

Burn Something

Smash Things Against a Wall

Spontaneously Begin an Irish Jig

Call Your Mother

Throw a Coffee Table Out a Window

Sing "Auld Lang Syne" at the Top of Your Lungs

Do Some Squats

Swan Dive into a Nearly Freezing Body of Water

Take a Shot

Time to be merry and bright.

"First Noel" by Leslie Odom, Jr

"A Holly Jolly Christmas" by Burl Ives

"Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas" by Kelly Clarkson

"All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

"Christmas (Baby Please Come Home" by Michael Buble

"Last Christmas" by Taylor Swift

"The Christmas Song" by Josh Groban

"White Christmas" by Idina Menzel

"O Holy Night" by David Archuleta

"Believe" by Josh Groban

"Les cloches du hameau" by Celine Dion

Or at least try to do.

1. I will wake up (sorta) on time for class.

2. I will look decent for class.

3. I will go to the gym more.

4. I will go to the library and study more.

5. I will meet new people.

For those long nights that turn into mornings when the struggle is real.

1. Walk in motivated and ready to rock

2. Disappointed you let it get this bad

3. Distracted: When a 10-Minute Break Becomes an Hour

4. When the Yearning for Sleep Sneaks Up

5. In the words of Lorelai Gilmore "Coffee, Coffee, Coffee"

Oh, so done.

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