It's almost April and with that comes what we've all feared: graduation. And while that is super exciting, it's also scary to think about what comes after.
For a lot of people, that means moving back home.
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Let me start out by saying that I love my parents, but man, oh man, being 22 and being roomies with mom and dad takes a lot of work.
So here are some things I learned from having moved back in with my parents.
1. There is absolutely no shame.
This one is a tricky one to start, and probably the hardest thing I've had to contend with. But in reality, so many people move back home for a million different reasons and there is no shame with it. Whether it's for financial reasons, medical reasons, maybe you've graduated college and you're still figuring your shit out or maybe you just simply miss your parents, these are all valid reasons. And no matter what any body says, it's your life, your decision, let the haters hate. After telling a guy at a bar once that I had recently moved back home, he said "you shouldn't share that with people" and that is exactly the opposite of how life should be. And there will be some people who just don't get it, but you just gotta do you, because in reality this isn't a big deal, it's not permanent, and at the end of the day, you're making the best decision for yourself. As Rihanna said "don't let the bastards get you down." Keep on rockin' guys.
2. You'll be saving some cash money.
Most of the cases, (and I want to be sensitive here for this may not always be the situation), you won't be paying rent. But if you are chipping in to your rent, you'll at least save some money because you wont be paying a check every month to your landlord who doesn't even fix your fridge even though you've put in a work order maybe a thousand times. If you can, try to put aside some money once and a while to freakin' treat yo 'self, and that brings me to my next point.
3. It's important to make your room feel like yours.
Whether you're moving back from a dorm or an apartment somewhere, there will be times where it seems like you have no space to your own. Because even though this is your room, after having lived on your own, it may feel like you're simply back for visit, like you're lodging. And even though mom is great, and your dog is adorable, and dad's cooking smells amazing, it can get a little overwhelming at times, and it's nice to retreat to your own space. Grab a couple bucks and get to a Target, find some temporary wallpaper and shake it up a bit, because at times it'll feel like you have no control, and it's important to remember that you do. Here is a blog post that my favorite blogger, Joanna Goddard, wrote about cheap, affordable art (and even though ripped out magazines pages thrown on your wall look super cool, for a more polished ~adult~ look, throw some prints in a cheap frame, and voila! )
4. And then there's dating.
Look, dating is hard in general. Throw in two over-protective parents and suddenly you've got a whole lot of people asking a whole lot of questions about who your new friend is, and what they're doing sneaking out your upstairs door at seven in the morning. It's important to set some boundaries with your parents in general, but this one in particular is vital. It can be uncomfortable, like really uncomfortable, but that's what dating is about right? Adults do hard things, and it's good to learn how to have difficult conversations. Right? .....Right? But anyway, go ahead and find the Jay-Z to your Beyonce.
5. It's normal to regress...but not too much.
I'll be the first to admit that living back at home has made me, to put it bluntly, lazy. When I'm not living with my parents, I'm pretty on top of my shit. I do laundry, I buy groceries, I clean my room (not often, but I do it.) But I've found that after moving back, I've started to rely on my parents more. The simple task of getting coffee in the morning seems to be infinitely tougher when loving mom makes the best cup of joe ever, especially when that means you don't have to leave your house. This is where the boundaries come in again, while it's okay to need to cuddle with your mom and your favorite stuffed animal, it's important to realize that you need to, basically, stay on top of your shit. Your parents will be happy, and trust me, you'll feel better if you do. And even though this is still your home, you are responsible for being a good roommate. Give your parents the same courtesy they give you.
6. Remember: this isn't permanent.
There will be moments where this feels overwhelmingly stressful. It can seem that some of your friends are off on their own, living their lives. Let's face it though, things always seem better on Instagram. Chances are, things aren't as groovy as everyone's making them out to be. So just remember, this isn't going to be forever. So try to find moments of enjoyment, you may be surprised that parents can be fun too.
And just remember, there are way worse things than shacking up with your parents for a while...you'll be okay.
