It's only about a week away before I start my second year of college, and I am both nervous and excited to begin just as I was when I began my freshman year.
Freshman year in college went by so quickly. In just under a year, I experienced and learned so many things that I never did in high school or at home. There were some things that I wish I could do again, and some that I wish I could have avoided. This year, I am planning on learning from mistakes that I made last year in order to be more successful and happier than I was last year. I'm not saying I did not have a good freshman year, but there were a couple things I wish I could've changed so I could've avoided the hard times I went through.
For me, high school was enjoyable most of the time, but I had my share of drama, betrayal, heartbreak, and other hard times. Most of my peers were in cliques and all I wanted to do is fit in with a group of people that would accept me for who I am and make my life better, just like all the movies portray like, The Perks of Being a Wallflower or The Breakfast Club. However, fitting in for me was challenging, as I was a very shy person back then and was also socially awkward. I would usually pretend to be someone I'm not in order for people to like me. The popular people would let me hang out with them and would often cheer me on and yell my name, "BELLMAN! BELLMAN! BELLMAN!" I thought I was accepted into the popular group, but little did I know that I was just used as a joke to them. I didn't realize it before, but I do now. Because of all those hard memories, I wanted to escape, run away, and move far, far away from all that which is why I chose to go to school all the way across the country.
I had my mind set that college was going to be a fresh start in life where I can truly let go, be myself, pursue what I love to do, and find people along the way that will bring me up and be the best friends I've always wanted.
My first thought was that my first best friend would be my first roommate. We met before school started on Facebook and started talking to each other throughout the summer. We seemed to get along well, so we requested each other as roommates for the year. When I first arrived at school, I was so excited to meet him and I finally did when we both moved in on the first day of orientation. I remember the first week being so much fun because we were the only people who knew each other on campus and participated in all the welcome week activities together. We even made new friends together on those nights. Later on, we started talking to our other suite-mates and we all started to eat together for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. From there on out, we stuck with that group for the entire year.
A couple weeks went by and me and my roommate started to drift apart. I desperately tried to hang with him as much as I can, but he usually went his own way. After that, I started hanging with another one of my suite-mates who by surprise, actually became my best friend. Me and him became very close and I was really happy that I met someone that cared for me and wanted to spend time with me. We went to the gym together, we hosted a radio show together, we'd watch TV every Wednesday night, and we'd say goodnight to each other right before we went to bed.
Everything was going great, but sometimes, he went off to hang with other people or would do stuff that I wasn't particularly a fan of. Naturally, I would get really upset, and sometimes jealous, if he didn't hang out with me all the time or missed one of our daily activities. I was so miserable that first semester because, besides him and my suite-mates group, I didn't have many other friends outside of that. My life consisted of classes and going back to my dorm. I was depressed at times and called home crying to come back after the first semester.
After the semester ended and I went back home for winter break, I decided to get through the second semester, and if I couldn't be happier after that, I would come back home. The first thing I did when I came back second semester was join more clubs at the club fair. Although I never considered Greek life, I decided to join a fraternity. Joining more clubs and joining a fraternity were probably the best decisions I ever made because I met so many people, made tons of new friends, and now, had different groups to jump around from.
Along the way, I was too focused on my fraternity, clubs, and friends that I forgot the number one reason why I was going to school and why my parents are paying so much money for me to go: to go to class, get good grades, and help me get a job in the future. I focused my attention on everything else, but my grades, which led to a decline in my GPA.
I learned a couple things that year: First, Don't be afraid to let yourself go and be yourself. If people can't accept you for who you are, then find others that will because there are many people out there like you. Second, classes and work should always be your number one priority above anything else. You are paying a ton of money to go there so make the most of it. People will come and go from your life, but your education will always stick with you and benefit you wherever you go. And third, pursue something you love to do and are happy doing. Don't try to please others. Join groups or clubs that interest you because you will make many friends that way.
Freshman year taught me so much and I am prepared to learn from those lessons to make sure I have a good and successful second year of college.