Oh, senior year of high school, how I look back fondly upon you. Sure, applying for college was rough, and waiting for the decision was even rougher, but things turned out okay, I guess. Trying to navigate parties and classes, figuring out what to wear to class, maybe even dipping in your toe for the first time in the world of drinking – sometimes the little things in high school stressed me out too. Everything was happening so fast – the last football victory of the year flew by, the last time fancy red and blue and green prom dresses flashed by, and before you knew it, the last year of high school was just plain over. As I look back on senior year and reminisce, I realize that there are several things I really wish I had known – or taken to heart – during that time.
There will always be people who are smarter than you.
And that’s okay. It’s okay because once you realize this, you can stop uselessly comparing yourself to everyone or trying to be the very, very best in every aspect. It’s also so so so so SO important (did I mention that it is really, really, REALLY important?) to remember that being smart doesn’t necessarily make you a good person, so someone being smarter than you doesn’t say anything about them being better than you. It’s okay because they won’t be smarter than you in every single subject of the world. I myself choose to devote large amounts of time to Netflix, and as a result, I’m fairly knowledgeable in anything even remotely related to stand-up comedy specials or How I Met Your Mother or Spanish telenovelas. We are smart in what we choose to devote our time to, and that’s a decision we get to make entirely on our own.
No, seriously, your SAT or ACT score doesn’t matter that much.
It’s always been my firm belief that standardized tests and GPAs are NOT any sort of accurate indicator of intelligence, but I do remember in high school thinking that those arbitrary numbers would be a college’s first impression of me, so they had to be important … right?? Debatable. But once you’re past that hurdle, they honestly don’t matter at all. No one cares if you were valedictorian at your high school or that you did twenty-seven different extracurriculars but didn’t commit yourself to any of them – they care about the kind of person that you are, and the kind of person that you aspire to be. All these trivial things that high school made you think were important don’t dictate who you are, and at college, you get a chance to prove that you’re so much more than what you can put down on paper.
If you’re going to a different school than your significant other, give long distance a shot.
Across the board, I see people split up from their significant other because of the argument that it isn’t practical or realistic, and that it probably would have ended anyway, so it might as well end sooner than later, and across the board, I see lots of what-ifs. I see a lot of regret for at least not trying it and figuring out what could have been. I don’t have a lot of personal experience with this one, but from what I’ve seen – it’s better to have tried it and realized that it wouldn’t work out as opposed to forcing something good to end before it really needed to.
Neither high school nor college is anything like the movies.
I had high expectations of what high school should have been like (thanks for nothing, Mean Girls) and what college should be like (thanks for nothing, every college movie in existence). It’s not a non-stop party, and yes, classes are actually important, and you actually have to show up. All together, though, the real deal is so much better than what the movies show. At the end of the day, it’s not about partying and it’s not about classes, it’s about the people you meet and the people you grow to love unconditionally. It’s about learning about human nature through your interactions with others. Most of all, it’s about learning about yourself.
That really bad habit of doing homework ten minutes before class? Get rid of it.
You seriously don’t have time to do an entire problem set or write a paper even an hour before class, much less ten minutes, unless you’re not a human. Unfortunately, you are a human, so it’s not possible. Get your homework done. College is a time where you really want to make a good impression of yourself to your professors, because these very professors might very well be crucial to mentoring you during your senior thesis or be the connect you need for research opportunities. It’s time to put the effort in and make that good impression. The truth of the matter is that it’s not high school anymore, and a lot more is expected of you than word vomit to reach a word count.
Your college transition will be different than everyone else’s.
Everyone deals with the transition differently. I hate that I can say this, but I don’t miss home. I don’t miss my parents, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love them or I wouldn’t want them around, I just know I can function without them and be fine. I think living in a dorm is great, and I love that I’m probably a little too close to the people who live around me. I’ve lived away from home before for extended periods of time thanks to summer camps, and I’m used to it, but I know a lot of people who aren’t. I know a lot of people who haven’t adapted to college life as easily, and that’s totally okay, too. I know people who call their moms twice a day, and I’m lucky if my mom wants to talk to me twice a month.
Where you go is a lot less important than what you do with your college experience.
During senior year, everyone’s worried about the name of the school that you’re going to after high school. I’ve seen people get angry they didn’t get into their dream schools, even when they knew their dream schools didn’t cater to their actual dreams. Some people want to go to a school because of the brand, and I think that’s the wrong way to approach college. People should want to go to a place where they feel like they belong, not because it’ll increase their status as a human being. The name of the school does not define your experience at the school – it’s the people. When I was deciding between colleges, I knew that I could be happy anywhere I went because I love being put into a crowd of people I don’t know and just making new friends. I knew that no matter where I finally chose to go, there would people I’d love and people I wouldn’t. I ended up choosing Harvard because I want to be a teacher. There is nothing in the world that Harvard values more than education, and there is no place that values education more than Harvard. I’m not saying that there weren’t other factors that went into my decision, such as my sister also living in Boston so keeping the family together, but when it comes down to it, I know I made the right decision for me, and what I hope is for the right reason.
It’s okay to not go to college.
Society has this weird obsession with trying to make everyone think that in order to be successful, you need a college degree, and that’s just not true. College is a profitable industry into which you don’t have to buy. If college isn’t the right decision for you, then don’t go. I know people who look at college as the biggest waste of $100,000 of their lives, and eighteen-year-olds shouldn’t have to feel the pressure of making an investment of that scale that might not even pay out. If college is a step in the direction you want to go, great! If not, great! You should do what’s right for you, what will help you achieve what you want to achieve.
It’s okay to not be okay.
College is a time of change, a time of really learning about yourself despite all the chaos that surrounds you. There’s so much ahead of you, so much uncertainty surrounding your future, and yet all around you are people who look like they have their lives together. Everyone seems so happy… so why don’t you? This feeling hits everyone (and I mean, everyone), even if we don’t talk about it in everyday conversation. And that’s okay. It’s important to remember that we can’t always trust the image of people we see on social media, especially with crushingly real reminders like Madison Holleran. I could go on and on about why it’s okay to be not be okay, but Lauren Sierra says it best in her article.
Be unapologetically you.
You honestly don’t have time to put up a façade or the energy to pretend like you’re someone else. In high school, there was so much pressure to be and act a certain way so that people would accept you. In college, there will always be people who like you for you, quirks and all. College will be a time to be exactly who you were meant to be, so get a head start by truly being you in high school. If someone doesn’t like you for you, why do you need him or her in your life? (The answer is, you don’t.) Find your group of people with whom you can awkward dance even if there’s no music playing. Find people that won’t judge you for the amount of food you’re constantly shoving into your mouth. Find people who won’t judge you on your terrible life decisions or bad taste in music (or is it good and no one realizes it but you?) or disgusting habits like not cleaning your room (shout out to my roommate who deals with so much because I’m a disgusting human being). Embrace who you are. Be unapologetically you.
