As a shopaholic, I do not discriminate. However, I find it most difficult to keep my thoughts to myself on this special topic--Publix. You see, no matter my intentions upon pulling into the parking lot, the second those double doors open, all hope goes out the window. Publix is like a magical vortex where broke college kids dream of spending our parents' seemingly unlimited amount of money. Because yes, we do, in fact, need that third box of cookies; we had a rough week and that’s enough said, alright? Even if we don’t need the product on display, whether it be cookie or hummus, somehow Publix finds a way to make us need it in our fridges. Now, while it is one of the most pleasant places to shop, I have quite the amount of things going on in my head while I’m there.
There’s no better place to start than the beginning:
- First, you go in with a very detailed, possibly short list that you are “determined” to stick to this time (yeah, right).
- Walking in and grabbing a basket in hopes it will prevent you from buying things you don’t need.
- Passing the B.O.G.O. deal on ice cream you don’t even like, but it's buy one get one free, so it doesn’t even matter.
- Thinking you’re in the mood for a sub, seeing the line, and thinking, “HA, just kidding.”
- Forcing yourself to not buy sprinkle cookies after staring at them for five minutes, only to grab them right before you check out.
- Wishing you had a kid or were under 10 years old to get a free cookie.
- Always wondering how the bakers get so perfect at writing in cursive on a cake when you can barely write your name in print.
- Purposefully passing through the fresh produce section in an attempt to be healthy and ending up in the frozen isle buying Dino-nuggets. Adults eat those too, right?
- Hating the people who go to the “10 items or less” line but clearly have over 30 items.
- Wanting so badly to be grown up and buy fresh deli meat, but then seeing the price and walking away.
- Getting annoyed when you forget that their card machine has a chip reader that doesn’t work but you already put your card in there and now look like an idiot.
- Finally, feeling like a jerk when you say “no” to donating to dying children, but you’re broke so it's not your fault.
Hopefully I’m not the only one who does or thinks these things. Either way, nothing will stop me from making my monthly shopping trip there!