In Beyonce's iconic Pretty Hurts video, she was asked about her aspiration in life as a pageant queen. Her answer was simply 'happiness', which has was quite the odd response. I find it odd that anyone would aspire to be happy. That aspiration ultimately suggests that we live a generally sad life, which is realistically untrue. I’ve spent twenty years of my life learning that it’s not happiness that I’m looking for. Instead, it’s peace. I want to find peace from within my heart and carry it around with me and live in a peace of mind. Peace and contentment are the two assets that I’m relentlessly attempting to conquer in life. Happiness, on the contrary, is just like sadness, an emotional state of mind. Emotions are indeed temporary as life events are renowned for striking one’s life unexpectedly. Feeling blue and down or high and on top of the world seem just the same thing for me, as in inevitably and constantly changing. Dwelling in sadness or happiness can be easy, but living on the verge of the uncertainty of the length of these periods can be dreadfully haunting. Peace, on the other hand, once found and established, can be carried around like an accessory. Peacefulness with oneself is rewarding, fulfilling, and contagious. Since I’ve taken on a journey of finding peace with myself, my multiple identities, and my surroundings, I’ve constructed a spectrum of practices that have become highly essential to the consistency of my relentlessness in finding peace. Here’s a list of a few of the practices that have become tremendously helpful that you might also find appealing to take on in 2017.
The first thing that I found extremely essential is contemplation. As we live in the midst of utter chaos, it’s necessary to take some time off and shut down the multiplicity of voices in one’s mind. I envy yoga practitioners for conquering their practice and making the most out of it, yet yoga failed to be appealing to me personally. However, I began to take five to ten minutes a day as my own contemplation practice. Spending those minutes in complete solitude was the ultimate key of initiation of a new lifestyle. As I take a little time off from my busy life, I sit quietly in either a dark and closed room or out in nature and contemplate. It seemed really hard to do at first, especially since I am a person that stresses out a lot. But once I took the first step and became practice became consistent, it blended in and became a regular habit of mine.
After beginning the practice of daily contemplation, I found the process of being present to be fitting as a next step. Normally, we tend to go on with our lives completely rushed, making everyday activities feel like burdening chores. Subsequently, I began to pay more attention to my routine practices while diving deeper into my heart and allowing my heart and mind to connect. Allowing your feelings to flow through everyday activities while remaining thoughtful about them makes even the most tedious ones more enjoyable. This allowed me to experience the joy and fulfillment that those activities provide. I force myself to be present when I sing out loud, when I dance my butt off, when I read a book, or even when I'm in the bathroom doing my thing. By being present, I become aware of the beauty of my tiresome routine.
Let’s say you were successful in doing all of the above; however, you can’t avoid getting struck with life atrocities that can successfully turn your life upside down. Not just atrocities, even the happiest moments in life can be life-altering at the end if not handled well. I found a little control of one’s overflowing emotions and feelings to be helpful. Take the five minutes off and do something fun and take a break from extreme sadness, happiness, anger, frustration, etc.. Once a strong hurricane of emotions takes over, it’s easy to get caught up in it. Take some time off to allow yourself to slow down and comprehend the reality of what’s going on. Slowing down prevents you from being hasty when it comes to reacting and taking action. The practice of writing is as helpful as any other practice. Taking note of little details on a piece of paper can help draw the big picture as it is often ignored.
Another problem that I’ve encountered throughout my arduous journey is what little attention I have given to my own mental health status. As life continues to get more complicated for many of us, our brains and minds are enormously affected and challenged. I’ve recently started treating my mental health state the same way I treat my physical one. Don’t hesitate to talk to a professional psychologist for counseling or even a psychiatrist if medication is necessary. Mental health crises can be detrimental if gone undiagnosed and untreated. Once one’s mental health status is scrutinized and stabilized to a fair extent, it’s much easier to initiate and utilize other practices.
As you begin to set goals for the new year, it's crucial to be realistic and to give credit to the person that you’ve been structured and composed into throughout previous years. Figure out who you are and where you are before you begin to challenge yourself into being a different version of yourself. Personally, I recognize that my current self, including my current habits and practices, are parts of who I am that cannot be abandoned. I also recognize how hard and slow it can be to enrich new habits and practices into my life. As the process can be draining, so it’s crucial to remain patient and look for motivations to aid the process.