First, I’d like to say that several years ago, I was the farthest thing from a sorority girl. I hated the way they dressed, acted... all that jazz. About a year ago, before I left for college, I considered looking into it solely because I heard that sororities are often stereotyped, and maybe there would be a slight chance they wouldn’t be like they are in the movies. I was hoping that, maybe, just maybe I’d find one that actually held strong values and made me feel like a stronger woman, and efficient member of society. After spending many days of research, watching recruitment clips on YouTube and reading through each sorority’s page, I had my heart set on a few I liked. Big sororities, with many many sisters, who all looked like they had fun. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I lost my way right there. I lost sight of what I was truly looking for in greek life, and focused more about finding a sorority that had more members. That went to parties. That had a huge, beautiful house I could one day maybe live in. I had three sororities on a list on my Google drive, and wasn’t going to settle for anything less.
About a month into college, I was reading through emails one night. Since I didn’t attend rush, I applied online since I was an out of state student. I knew I’d eventually receive emails, and had made sure that I was aware when they would come in so I’d be prepared to accept my bid with one of the three I liked. I didn’t get any emails, though, from the ones I had hoped. I got emails from two sororities. One, I don’t remember the name of. I think it might have been Alpha Chi Omega or something like that. I may be wrong. The other sorority I got an email from was Theta Phi Alpha. The letter was cute, formal, and I had opened it luckily a couple hours before the recruitment event had begun. So, right away, I got myself ready and walked over to the union to meet these girls.
Though, walking in, I didn’t see what i’d expected. Walking in, I saw maybe 10-15 girls, all dressed pretty casual, and enjoying a very small group of company with their root beer floats. I was the first recruit to show. Therefore, I was nervous. Was there only supposed to be that many girls? Maybe this is how recruitment events usually looked. Where was everyone else? Why aren’t they doing this at their sorority house? I kept my questions to myself, and quickly learned that the majority of the girls were standing in that room. Very few weren’t there that night. So yeah, at first, I was skeptical about the small amount of girls. But we got along well, bonded quick, and they invited me to go to the lake with them that upcoming weekend. I already began to feel like a part of their small family. I went, bonded even more, and came back only to receive a bid. I almost cried, honest to God. I was emotional. Not because of the reasons they show you on tv, but because I felt like I had a support system. They didn’t want me to join just because I was another girl in the family, or because I was pretty, or because I dressed or acted a certain way. No, they truly made me feel like they wanted me to join because they liked me for who I was. This was so important to me, as before, I was never really into the whole greek life thing. In fact, I love metal music and have a tattoo of a dinosaur on my foot. I’m the complete opposite of what you’d expect a sorority girl to be. My personality is its own, I don’t dress like everyone else, and I don’t have to drink to have fun. These girls brought that out in me, and that’s all I had hoped for in a sorority. Plus, they made it clear that they held very strong values. Certain things we could and could not do. Things we had to be responsible for. Consequences if we were not responsible. We had to study a certain amount, maintain a decent GPA, etc. These lessons did not seem like a bother to me like they may some girls. Some girls look at greek life as a chance to party, look cute 24/7, and meet guys. Or, maybe that’s the stereotype in my head. I never believed it after I joined one, but before, that’s everything that media showed greek life to be. I was very, very wrong. In a short time, my sorority got me to hold many values. This isn’t just good for the sorority, or greek life, but for myself personally. It’ll teach me how to be responsible, what is okay to post on social media, and how to prepare myself professionally. This is what Theta Phi taught me. While I can’t speak for other sororities, for I don’t know them as well as I know my own. But I know each one has values they stand strongly by. I guess, I’m just really proud of ours.
Over time, Theta Phi became more than just a family and support system. They became a passion. Something to be proud of. Especially since there are so few of us, we are so close it seems and we all know each other pretty well. I’m a proud member of greek life, and looking back a year ago, I never saw myself here today. I never saw myself as the sorority type. But, with the right sorority, you can feel at home. The stereotypes you hear about, they are far from true. Theta Phi Alpha has only provided me good friends, fun events, and opportunities. This is what I had wanted from the beginning. I finally felt like an efficient member of society in my new town. Though we are small, we are close. Though we don’t have a house, why do we REALLY need one to be a sorority? It isn’t about the house. It isn’t about the money, because they all cost something. It isn’t about how many girls are in it. I finally found the sorority that held the values I had at one point lost track of. The values I didn’t think people would accept me for, simply because I overlooked the truth of greek life and believed in the stereotypes. In the end, it wasn't about anything less than finding my place among people who genuinely care.
Theta Phi Alpha is always looking for girls to join our sorority. No matter how big we get, no matter how small we are, we truly value each other and believe in each other. We are there for each other. Isn’t that what everyone deserves? Each girl, every single one of them made an impact on me in a way. I felt valued when I recited the creed. Valued when I found out who my big and the rest of my “family” was. Valued when I was given chances, and even valued when I made a mistake.
I asked a few of my fellow sisters to write about their experiences with Theta Phi as well, just to kind of tell more of a diverse story. After all, this isn’t just about me or what I endured, it’s about each one of us and how we got to where we are now.
Jenni Stephenson
“I joined Theta Phi in October of my freshman year. In the beginning of my first semester I knew that joining Greek Life was all the rage at this campus, but I never expected myself to fit in with all of the sorority houses on campus. It wasn't until I met someone in my section in the Cornhusker Marching Band who introduced me to Theta Phi Alpha that I began actually seeing Greek life in my future. I liked hearing all of the things the sorority stands for, and how accepting they are. I was sold the minute my friend started talking about the chapter's philanthropies. Fast forwarding a few months, the person who introduced me to the chapter became my big, and I became really close with so many girls in the sorority. Once initiated, I was introduced to so many more opportunities to help out our sorority that I was blown away. Who would have thought, as a freshman, one could have the option to be head chair for socials, treasurer, philanthropy, Vice President and more?? The leadership opportunities are a very beneficial aspect to the chapter because it allows many girls to grow in what they're interested in, which is what I love about Theta Phi. Every girl in the chapter is strong, empowered and motivated, which is also something we pride ourselves on. Unfortunately, we don't have a house, and many girls haven't heard of the sorority because of that. In my opinion, a house on campus is just a materialistic thing that Greek Life idolizes. Living in a house would be cool, I will admit, but it shouldn't be a necessity when looking for a sorority or a frat to join. Theta Phi Alpha doesn't need a house to know that the girls in the sorority are there to help and support you, and they mean it. Before you even join, you are told what we stand for and what we believe, which is something ladies should pay attention to before thinking about if a sorority has a house or not. Being in a sorority has even led me to being part of a bible study with girls in other sororities on campus, which I'm thankful to be involved with. In the long run, I know I'll be happy with deciding against joining the common sorority lifestyle, because it has made me into who I am today, and I know it'll continue to as I further my time at Nebraska. I'm saying all of this as a current sophomore. With being in the sorority for a little over a year, and still being able to passionately talk about the chapter, it's safe to say that I made the best decision possible in choosing Greek life, and it's clear that we are a force to be reckoned with.”
Paige DeDecker
“When I first came to UNL, I was confident that Greek life was not for me. After a while though, I realized that I wanted to expand my social circle beyond those in my major and that I wanted to get more involved on campus. When I learned about Theta Phi Alpha and spent time around girls in the chapter, I knew this was something I had to be a part of. I like the fact that the chapter is small; I got to know everyone right away as a new member and immediately felt at ease in the group. I also got to hold a leadership position right after I was initiated, and I've learned so much through that role and my overall experiences. I like being a part of Theta Phi Alpha because the sisterhood is so strong, and without it I wouldn't have met some incredible individuals.”
Mikayla Cruickshank
“I joined Theta Phi Alpha because of preference day during Rush week. Ashley Richards, my sister told me that everything happens for a reason. During rush week I had many problems with whether or not this was something that I was truly about. So I gave myself a motto for the rest of the week “everything happens for a reason.” Once hearing Ashley say that I knew that I found my place, my new home, my sisters. I’m a Theta Phi Alpha because I believe in something amazing and this is what Theta Phi Alpha is.
I’m still apart of Theta Phi Alpha because of the amazing sisters and best friends that I have created. Mostly every girl in my chapter has been here for me during my low moments in my life and has been there for me during my happy moments. No matter the time I can call someone and they will listen to me. I have made connections with amazing girls and I can consider them my best friends. Liz, my big has been here for me since the beginning. We are honestly two peas in a pod. If it wasn’t for her I don’t know where I would be. Alexis, she is always there for me when I need someone even if it is picking me up at midnight. Ashley, my president always gives me crap but she is helping me become the leader that she knows I have potential to be. These are only a few girls that have made Theta Phi Alpha my home and these few girls are the reason for me staying at Theta Phi Alpha. I’ve made a home here and I can’t see myself anywhere else. These girls are my family, but most importantly my sisters.”
