Therapists have this bad rep to them and honestly, they're not my favorite people. I've done family therapy and I'm done one on one, so I guess you could say I'm a professional. Sure, they have been helpful in my past during rough times, but a lot has happened in 8 years. Sexual assault (more than once,) 5 knee surgeries, a family death, fell in love and am almost done with college. I mean, where do I begin? My life is a mess…I am a mess too.
Today I went to the doctor to get a spot checked out, and to go over my medications. I told her these past couples of weeks my anxiety attacks have gotten worse and more frequent. I can't sleep, and I have been having constant nightmares for a couple of months now.
My doctor told me I should see a therapist to figure out what is causing these nightmares, finding coping mechanisms for handling the steps of going through grief, and just talk about things that are clearly haunting me even when I'm sleeping in the comfort of my own bed sheets.
I think the hardest part is admitting to myself that I need help.
I don't know why but I feel like therapy has this stigma around it. Like wow, you must be really mentally ill to see a therapist. That's how I see it for myself, not necessarily towards other people and their personal journeys. I've had therapists who have helped, and I've had therapists who didn't help at all; especially when I needed them to help me through some of my hardest times.
I know many people who have had great success and have made amazing strides in overcoming their past and what is going on with them at the time. Thanks to my primary doctor I've realized I too need to take care of myself not just physically, but mentally and emotionally.
I know it's scary to admit that you need help.
Honestly, when my doctor told me I should go see a counselor I burst out into tears. For me, I went to therapy when I was weak. Yet this time I'm trying to think of it as a need. Like for example, I must go to physical therapy once a week because of surgery. I need to go to therapy because I'm not emotionally and mentally okay, and I'm telling me it's okay to not be okay.
Say it with me: It is okay to get professional help. It is okay to not be okay.
I hope I have inspired you to also take care of yourself.
Mental and emotional health is just as important as physical health. Don't let anyone's opinion on your care effect what you choose. I reminded going to therapy would cost money, but also having a mental breakdown and being unable to finish my upcoming semester would also cost money, too.
Fight for yourself, and for your happiness.
Life is so beautiful around us and we should be able to see it without constant fear and doubt.
