I'll never forget the look on his face as he stood over me with his hands wrapped around my throat. His grip got tighter and tighter as pure shock took over my body. Tears burned down my face as my eyes begged him to stop. All I wanted in that moment was for someone to save me. Finally the pain and fear ended as I slowly drifted off.

I'll never forget the other time when he got so mad he broke my nose. Days before I saw my entire family and my nose and face were black and blue. I made up a great story of how I got hit in the face with a baseball because I failed to catch it. Ironically enough I played softball for over 8 years and damn sure know how to catch a ball, but nobody else caught on.

Or the other time when our neighbors called the cops for domestic violence. He went outside and cried a good sob story to the multiple male officers, telling them I was trying to hurt him (he's double my size). I'll never forget how exposed I felt when 6 male officers stood in my living room towering over me as I sat there barely clothed and crying. Asking ME why I was hurting HIM, and reassuring me I would go to jail next time.
It occurred to me lately that by constantly protecting him, hiding from my reality, and failing to share the stories of my ex fiancé is only hurting myself as well as others in similar situations. And in turn, giving him the power. But I'm here to say right now that you no longer have the power over me. None of those situations were my fault like your narcissistic self led me to believe. I'm done hiding from you and your friends.

I'm not afraid anymore. I'm not afraid to share my story. I'm not afraid to tell others about the monster you really are. I'm done protecting you and blaming myself. And most importantly, I'm done letting other men and women feel the same way because of people like you.

If you or someone you know is in a abusive relationship, please reach out to someone and get help! We are ready to support you through this. There is a way out, there are people who will believe you, and YOU have the power. Nobody else!