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Student Life

The Writing Process

Here are step-by-step instructions for writing a paper.

Benjamin K. Paplham

Apr 18, 2016

Saint Norbert College

Lord of the Rings

The journey of a thousand miles may begin with a single step, but nobody ever tells you how big of a step you need to take. And when it comes to writing, something else nobody tells you is that you sometimes have to take a step backwards or sideways or take a long winding curve along the back roads through swamps and prickly thorn bushes. So that’s why I decided to help my fellow travelers out and provide a clear, step-by-step process to writing a paper.

1. Get the assignment.

2. Choose a book.

3. Read with a passionate and open mind.

4. Spend time by yourself doing something you love to unwind.

5. Think about the book critically.

6. Brainstorm.

7. Have unrealistic expectations for how quickly you can write this essay.

8. Come up with a mind-blowing argument to build your paper around.

9. Begin writing.

10. Procrastinate (this will be the most time-consuming step).

11. Forget everything and repeat steps five through ten.

12. Have a flash of brilliance that lasts three seconds.

13. Write your body paragraphs in which you explain your points.

14. After multiple drafts, accept your fate.

15. Have a friend review your paper.

16. Edit your paper and avoid the feeling of impending doom.

17. Sell your soul to the devil.

18. Realize it’s 11 am and the paper is due at noon.

19. Congratulations! You finished!

20. Receive the grade.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The Writing Process

Here are step-by-step instructions for writing a paper.

1. Get the assignment.

2. Choose a book.

3. Read with a passionate and open mind.

4. Spend time by yourself doing something you love to unwind.

5. Think about the book critically.

6. Brainstorm.

7. Have unrealistic expectations for how quickly you can write this essay.

8. Come up with a mind-blowing argument to build your paper around.

9. Begin writing.

10. Procrastinate (this will be the most time-consuming step).

11. Forget everything and repeat steps five through ten.

12. Have a flash of brilliance that lasts three seconds.

13. Write your body paragraphs in which you explain your points.

14. After multiple drafts, accept your fate.

15. Have a friend review your paper.

16. Edit your paper and avoid the feeling of impending doom.

17. Sell your soul to the devil.

18. Realize it’s 11 am and the paper is due at noon.

19. Congratulations! You finished!

20. Receive the grade.

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Here are just a few of those things.

Take the time to thank that one friend in your life you will never let go of.

1. Thank you for being the one I can always count on to be honest.

2. Thank you for accepting me for who I am.

3. Thank you for teaching me what real love feels like.

4. Thank you for always making sure I'm safe.

5. Thank you for going through things with me.

6. Thank you for teaching me to take care of myself.

7. Thank you for going out of your way to make me feel supported.

8. Thank you for always being there to back me up, even when you know I'm wrong.

9. Thank you for constantly pushing me to live up to my potential.

10. Lastly, thank you for making such a huge impact on my life.

It sucks, but you’ll make it through

1. Please just be seasonal allergies

2. I must not have gotten enough sleep last night

3. I’ll just take a little nap

4. Oh no, I have so much due tomorrow!

5. I’m fine, I’ll just sleep it off

6. Do I have to be responsible today?

7. Ugh no, I can’t actually be sick

8. Alright, I’ll take some medicine and I’ll be fine

9. This is the worst day of my life

10. Mom?

11. She was right (like always)

12. Too bad you're busy and can’t take the day off tomorrow

13. You think about taking the day off, but realize you have like three tests

14. You think you're actually going to be sick forever

15. Finally, you're better!

Sleepovers are not a thing. They're just not.

1. You only ask things once.

2. Seriously, you only ask once.

3. When you do muster up the courage to ask your parents for something, you creep around and wait until they’re in a good mood.

4. Before you get that final yes, you have to go through an interview.

5. If you ever got “the eye,” you knew you were screwed.

6. You were always the first to leave your group of friends when hanging out.

7. If you say you will be home at a certain time, you better be home at that time.

8. Seeing a missed call from your parents sends fear and horror through your veins.

9. If relatives are coming over to the house, your room better be clean.

10. You are careful about what jokes you share with your parents.

11. "You’re not an adult until you turn 18! You can do whatever you want then!"

12. If plans change while you’re out, you better text or call.

13. Don’t talk back. Ever.

14. When you’re called by your full name, you’re in deep trouble.

15. Don’t make them call your name twice.

16. Sleepovers are not a thing.

17. Despite all of these things, you know your parents love you.

For better or for worse

1. Pets

2. Mornings

3. Mistakes

4. Cooking for yourself

5. Hosting

6. Taking care of yourself

7. Holidays

8. Roommates

9. Keeping focused and getting stuff done

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