I'd like to start off by saying this isn't meant to be a negative stab at the Air Force, because I really loved every minute of my time being in the Air Force, at least while it lasted. MTI's were amazing, the training facility was great, the people I met were fantastic and unique in every which way. I miss them every day. I've told a lot of my friends and family about this because it makes me feel better to be open about it. I've had a few people reach out to me and share similar experiences, and it's reassuring because I felt like I was the only one (besides the people that went through it with me).

With that being said, I wanted to share my experience so anyone who's feeling down and out about leaving the military before graduation can see that it happens to a lot of people. It's been a little over 6 months since I was separated from the Air Force and my life has come together nicely. I'm back in school, have an amazing job, incredible friends, and even better family to back me up the whole way to this point. As it turns out, besides my personal experience in Air Force separations, there are a lot of people that separate from the military and for a variety of reasons. This is my story about my journey into the Air Force, how it fell through, and my testament to all the men and women out there who've been separated during Basic Training or shortly thereafter.

I'm not going to make this story cliche by any means because my experience was quite the opposite. My brothers and I were highly dedicated in wanting to be in the military starting from a young age, and it finally happened for me just after my freshman year in college. Due to extenuating circumstances with loans and family issues, I decided to pursue my dream military career of being in the Air Force Reserve as a Medic. It started out like any other enlisted person's career does; talk to the recruiter, fill out lots of paperwork, go to MEPS, get sworn in, and go to Basic Military Training (BMT). I enlisted in the reserves on October 1st. With the reserves, I was part of a Drill and Training Flight (DTF) Program, and that program very thoroughly prepared me for BMT. Moving on, 3 months later, the time came to go to boot camp and my DTF instructors all told me I was ready to go. I felt ready and I was SO excited, a little nervous, but mostly really enthused.

January 12th, 2016 was the day I shipped out. I told myself as I got on the plane and was careening down the runway, "I will not leave the ground with doubt." And I didn't. I got to San Antonio, arrived at the gathering place for all the incoming trainees and thankfully had a friend from home going to BMT with me. We had stuck together up until we got off the bus. It was okay because I was excited to go through this journey and make lifelong friends, but it turned out to be a very long night. We got there about 9pm, and my flight had finally gotten to our dorms around 6am. From then on, everything was near perfect! I could shut my mind off, go over everything I'd learned from DTF, focus on training, get fit again and even pick up Band again. I didn't mind the yelling, food was great, and facilities were fantastic. It was a dream.

However, next came separations, and that was wayworse than training, at least I thought so despite not making it too far. It actually felt like prison. There was no physical training (PT), because they didn't want you to get hurt so your process in the paperwork didn't get delayed. There weren't many other activities aside from the occasional speaker and meeting and that was about all besides eating. We also still had to get up everyday and wear your uniform up until the day we left and had to turn them in. Everyone in separations was complacent in some way, shape or form, but we still did what we had to do in order to not get yelled at. There was a lot of cleaning, sometimes with hand sanitizer on the chrome in the doorways, napping and reading or talking in the dorms. Basically you did everything you could to move your process in your assigned task along so you can get home and wait. In this case, boredom was a gift we rarely received. I was there for only a week, but some had been there for months. It was by far the most challenging part of my life.

There were quite a few variables that contributed to my separation, but I want to say this; if you're facing separation and have the option to stay, STAY. I didn't really have an option, unfortunately, but the separation process for the Air Force was actually grueling. If you don't have the option to stay, and you're being forced out; start planning what you want to do after you get home and know that it's okay to change your plans. Whether it was a childhood dream, or a spur of the moment decision to better your life and add structure or both; just know you have what it takes to do that for yourself. The military isn't cut out for everyone, and I wish everyday that I could go back and do it over again. Some days you might feel like you've failed, and other days you feel like you've accepted it and moved on. Just know that you're not alone and there are plenty of resources available for you to guide you back to moving on with life after you come home. It takes time, but you'll get there...hang in there, it'll be okay and you're certainly not alone.

If you'd like to know more details about my story, check out my blog, Life Love & Medical Gloves where I elaborated more on the process and what my week in separations was like. Feel free to read and share your thoughts.