Lets talk about something that most people struggle with but are too afraid to tell anyone- Fear. The definition of fear is: An unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat. I have struggled with fear ever since I was introduced to my first horror flick at the tender age of eight. Yes, I distinctly remember the night I met fear. I had just finished up watching Sleepy Hollow and I was terrified at what I had seen on the screen. The images of this frightening movie disrupted my sleeping patterns for two weeks straight.
I had now begun to wet the bed again for the first time since I was a toddler. With every creek and bump in the night, my once peaceful home had turned into a horror house for me. I began having night terrors and my fear of the dark intensified with each passing night. This was also the the age that I unfortunately experienced some awful things. Things that no child should have to experience. Things that left me with a unhealthy fear of God. I was terrified of Him. Before fear came into my life, I saw God as the loving, compassionate God that He truly is. I had no inaccurate filter that kept me from seeing His goodness. But now, all I could see was vengeance, fire and brimstone and I just wanted to stay out of His wrath radar.
That is what fear does:
1. Fear taints and twists your perception of reality so that all you can hone in on is the fear of being hurt.
2. Fear demands that you trust no one because it says that everyone is out to get you.
3. Fear makes you think that God doesn't love you and that He is waiting with a heavenly fly swatter to smack you every time you mess up.
4. Fear lies to you and says that you have to be in control of a situation to be safe.
5. Fear will cripple you to the joys of everything that God has created for you to have and it destroys any real relationship that you will ever have with Him or any one else.
I knew that awful experience that I went through was wrong, and because I took ownership of the terrible situation, I thought that God hated me because of what happened (even though looking back now I realize that it was certainly not my fault). Fear manipulated me into believing that God didn't and couldn't love me because of what was done. So, because I grew up thinking that I was unlovable by Him, I never could have a true relationship with Him and because I couldn't have an authentic relationship with Him, I went through several counterfeit relationships looking for something only He could provide.
Do you see how much of an impact fear has on a persons life? It creeps in at an early age and if not dealt with, grows with you and will become bigger and more debilitating as time continues to pass. But, there is hope! There is a plethora of scripture on fear, but it all boils down to love. 1 John 4:16-18 puts it this way, "We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love."
Bottom line, God is love. In order to be free from the grip of fear, you must first come to the realization that you are loved unconditionally by God. He isn't waiting on you to mess up, He already knows that you aren't perfect so that is why He sent the Holy Spirit to be your helper. For me, this is still a day to day process of walking this out by faith and trusting that God is who He says He is, and that He will never abandon me no matter how much I mess up. His perfect love continues to completely remove all of my fears and I can finally say that I am no longer a slave to fear and you don't have to be either.