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The True Meaning Of Christmas

What makes Christmas lit to me.

Megan Harris

Dec 18, 2016

Farmington, Michigan

Pixabay

Every year we hear about “the true meaning of christmas.” I personally believe that a lot of things make up the meaning of Christmas. Heres a few of my favorites:

1. When your siblings eat the best Christmas cookies and you’re stuck with the crusty ones that your Mom ends up throwing out.

2. Finding half of your gifts before Christmas day.

3. When your mom shoots you death glares across the dinner table when she realizes you pregamed dinner.

4. Realizing how big of a loser you are when your family asks about your love life and your school life all in the same conversation.

5. Children basically RKO-ing each other to get their presents out from under the tree first like it’s The Hunger Games.

6. Someone throwing up eggnog.

7. Someone throwing up because they saw someone else throw up eggnog.

8. Meeting your third cousin twice removed and getting asked how the eighth grade is going when you're in college.

9. That one person who's afraid of the family dog.

10. When you ask your brother for a sweater for Christmas and he buys you a hermit crab (true story).

11. Putting on makeup so family thinks your life is as on point as your contour.

12. Your mom taking photos of you Christmas morning when you look like a cracked out Santa then posting them on Facebook.

13. Arguing on which Christmas movie to watch with the family (animated Grinch or nah?)

14. Your mom vacuuming the house, driveway and the Christmas tree so that guests think that no-one lives there.

(PSA: this is totally a joke, don't be a Grinch)

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The True Meaning Of Christmas

What makes Christmas lit to me.

1. When your siblings eat the best Christmas cookies and you’re stuck with the crusty ones that your Mom ends up throwing out.

2. Finding half of your gifts before Christmas day.

3. When your mom shoots you death glares across the dinner table when she realizes you pregamed dinner.

4. Realizing how big of a loser you are when your family asks about your love life and your school life all in the same conversation.

5. Children basically RKO-ing each other to get their presents out from under the tree first like it’s The Hunger Games.

6. Someone throwing up eggnog.

7. Someone throwing up because they saw someone else throw up eggnog.

8. Meeting your third cousin twice removed and getting asked how the eighth grade is going when you're in college.

9. That one person who's afraid of the family dog.

10. When you ask your brother for a sweater for Christmas and he buys you a hermit crab (true story).

11. Putting on makeup so family thinks your life is as on point as your contour.

12. Your mom taking photos of you Christmas morning when you look like a cracked out Santa then posting them on Facebook.

13. Arguing on which Christmas movie to watch with the family (animated Grinch or nah?)

14. Your mom vacuuming the house, driveway and the Christmas tree so that guests think that no-one lives there.

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No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

Please hold your blonde joke.

1. "Is Elle Woods your spirit animal?"

2. "Is that your natural hair color?"

3. "Oh wow, you get good grades at school?"

4. "You must really like the color pink!"

5. "You’re probably not into sports, right?"

6. "You must have such a bubbly personality."

7. "Your wardrobe must consist of all things preppy."

8. "What sorority are you in?"

9. "You were probably a cheerleader in high school."

10. "You look like you’re from L.A. because your hair is so light."

11. "You definitely like Pumpkin Spiced Lattes from Starbucks!"

12. "Do you actually think blondes have more fun?"

13. "You must encompass the typical “white girl” stereotype."

14. "Is that daddy’s credit card you’re using?"

15. "So all of your friends are blonde too?"

16. "I’m surprised about you; I thought you would be a lot ditsier."

The world's greatest university meets the world's greatest show.

1. When you get your acceptance letter

2. When you try to figure out how class enrollment works

3. When it’s move in day

4. When you arrive on campus and see all of the attractive people

5. FROG Week

6. When you find your squad

7. When you visit DHall (RIP) or EHall for the first time

8. When you take on way too many credits

9. When you go to your first party at JMU

10. When the rival school shows up for the homecoming game (or any game really)

11. Sunday Brunch

12. When you see the infamous “preacher” for the first time

13. The first snow day

14. Madipalooza

15. When finals week rolls around

16. When you have to say goodbye

17. And when you finally get to go back

Do you have a small get-together or throw a big bash?

1. Your family and friends ask what you want for your birthday, so you give them a list of options.

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