During my high school experience, I was constantly busy. There was never a day where I just went home after school with nothing to do. I was always involved in a sport, club, musical, or a charitable event. This sounds overwhelming to most, but I loved every minute of it. I enjoyed running from the field in my shin guards and onto the stage for dress rehearsal. I was so used to never having a spare moment that it felt normal. I truly made the most out of my high school experience. I pushed myself to be involved and to achieve goals that I set for myself. By doing this, I motivated myself to strive to get better, do my assignments early so I was prepared, and never allow myself to get lazy.
When I entered college, I expected my lifestyle to stay the same. During the first week of college, I knew that the same lifestyle I had in high school was not the same as it was in college. Suddenly, I was confronted with something I never had ample amounts of before: time. I caught myself sitting in my dorm room alone and lost. There was rarely a moment in high school where I wasn’t surrounded by a group of classmates, teammates, or members of student government. Now, as I sat in my dorm room alone I encountered an overwhelming feeling of hopelessness.
I felt as though the person that I created in high school was gone. The high achieving, overly involved, student athlete was no more. I was just a student. Just my studies and me.
It took me the entire first semester to adjust to this fact. I dove into my studies head first, wanting to have the best grades in the class. All I did was do homework and study day and night. This was the first time that I had solely focused on academics and honestly, it was taking a toll on my stress level and sanity. At the end of the semester, all I wanted was a 4.0 GPA. I just wanted to reassure myself that if I was going to only be a student I was going to be the best student there is.
At the end of the semester, I fell short of that GPA and received a 3.8. I am very grateful I got on the Dean’s List...but something inside me was so disappointed. My confidence hit a low that I never experienced in the past. I felt as though I wasn’t going to be the person that I loved being anymore.
I saw students on campus who were involved in multiple organizations and I automatically felt jealous. I wanted to be like them and find my old self again. I was so motivated to become involved in everything and to gain leadership positions that I did not even know where to start. I felt like I hit a dead end.
When the second semester rolled around, I slowly started to find more opportunities to get involved. Flyers started popping up that I have never seen before and new opportunities were randomly arising. I like to say this is God opening doors for me; others might say it is the world giving me signs that everything will be okay.
Needless to say, I had a pretty rough first semester and this current semester isn't much easier. Success doesn't come easy so these trials are worth it. However, I also learned a lot about myself. The biggest lesson I learned is to trust in yourself. Overachieving is not necessarily a bad thing. It means that you are motivated and willing to work hard to be successful. But, something that must come with overachieving is patience. You can’t expect to have every accolade right away. Especially in a new environment such as a university. Each day is a new day to step towards your goals. They may be little steps, but each day you will be closer to who you want to be. Never lose faith in your abilities or your work ethic; those qualities will eventually take you to your dreams if you stay the course and have a little faith.
