There is always a Claudius to King Hamlet, a Ptolemy XIII to Cleopatra, and a Scar to Mufasa. Sibling rivalry is real and it has existed everywhere: history, art, literature and fiction. I write this article because I too am a nicer sibling and victim of an evil sibling's colonization. My sister has always been an evil matriarch and now is my time to throw shade at her through writing. I am doing it through writing because she works out every day and will bring me down in seconds if I actually ask for confrontation. I don't want to walk around with broken bones all summer. Also, she gives this death stare when she is angry that will probably scare the living hell out of Ted Cruz (ooops, I meant Satan) himself and I am not prepared for that. I never will be.
It was not always like this. My parents tell me that my sister always actually wanted a brother. When I was born, she was actually really happy. The tension began when she realized that I was breathtakingly gorgeous, fun and extremely lovable. The whole family became fond of me and it threatened her thunder. She was the celebrated reigning queen for two years, but not anymore. There was a new cool kid in town -- me. She denied it for a long time. But I was glowing brighter than the sunshine and the threat was real . She even asked the mirror on our wall "who the superior sibling of them all" is, but she only received disappointments because mirrors don't talk to muggles.
You can clearly see the tension between us in this picture. Just look at how scared I look in her company.
Her scheming just got more intense since then. She used her "older sibling" card to spit out those vicious three words, "he did it," every time we got into trouble. She lured me into believing that there were actually people inside our TV and asked me to break it and let them out. I, like a selfless, loving and caring brother that I am,always followed her instructions, only to take all the blame later. Trying to watch the show/movie of my choice was always like going to war because she always hogged the remote control like an evil politician hogs all the wealth, and held it tightly to make her dominance and authority loud and clear. Claudius and Scar might have killed their brothers for power, but my sister has done much worse. She has stolen and eaten my share of Cadbury Dairy Milk many times. I hid my chocolates from her, and she always managed to find them. She led me to believe that she and our parents found me inside a dirty trash bin and adopted me, and that I should always be grateful to her for that and give her all my money.
If we follow the notion of traditional gender roles and the idea of "being a man," my sister is more "man" than I am. I started watching wrestling because she started it. She used to learn the new wrestling moves every time and used them on me. #ThanksUndertaker She was always more sporty, and she has always been the social, extrovert sibling while I still am very socially awkward. If we get into a fight, she will win any day. She will win fights with most people. "She is the man." I read classics, and she reads all those intense wall street books.
So, yes, growing up with a badass, evil sibling has not been easy for me at all. I still remember when my friend punched me in the fifth grade and my nose bled all night. He apologized later and I was okay with that. But my sister was so mad, she threatened him so well the next day, he did not even show up for an exam until I had to go get him and say it was alright. Rumors traveled faster than light at the school we went to, and after that day, no one messed with me for the whole year. It was really sad, because you expect your nemesis to hate you, not love you.
Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little bit, and my sister is not the Cruella De Vil of a person that I presented her to be. But we both strictly follow basic siblings ethics, and slandering is one of the most important aspects of a healthy sibling rivalry. We do it to each other all the time. She is way more intelligent and smart than I am, but I will never confess to it. Her sass is already on fire as she attends one of the best graduate schools in the United States and I don't want to add any more to that growing level of "sass-frass." I will never accept defeat even though eventually I realized that she is, indeed, the superior sibling and I am actually secretly proud as she inspires so many people, including me. I have to throw my own shame and ego away to actually admit that I am more than happy to grow in her reflected light. After all, she is the older sibling and that is her duty.
Jokes aside, I would actually choose to relive my childhood any day because I had one of the coolest sisters (no matter how much of a bully she is). I have a very high ego myself, but it doesn't take much struggling for me to admit that she is better than me. (And I am saying this from heart and not because she is standing next to me and making me write it. This is definitely not a hostile situation and I don't want you to call 911. *or so she wants you to think*)
And it is scientifically proven (not really) that parents love the nicer sibling anyway. So, I will always be the favorite kid. I am fine with that.