We all know that people come in different shapes and sizes. Frequently magazines and other forms of media attempt to categorize particular body types in an attempt to offer guidance in regards to flattering apparel. Or perhaps it's just because everyone seems more comfortable "knowing" what they are-- somehow having a name for your body type makes people feel better. Well, considering the numerous types of body shapes out there, I can conclude that I am a pear. What does that mean? It means my bottom is considerably larger than my top. And. I. Hate. It. Here are just a few problems you face being a pear-shaped lady.
1. My bottom half and my top half look like they come from two completely different people. I literally have days where I only love half of myself.
2. Because I am not proportional whatsoever, I'm insecure about my body on both ends. Small boobs. Large butt. I feel like I just can't win.
3. I know this shouldn't matter, but I can't even decide whether I'm a "skinny person" or not. I've got some nice abs and a literal fat ass. Where do I fit on the fitness scale?
4. Sometimes I put on a really cute outfit, look down at myself, and love what I see... Then I encounter a mirror and get the straightforward perspective that shows just how big my hips really are.
5. Speaking of hips, it gets really old hearing that you have "birthing hips," even though that's the excuse I use whenever I'm being measured for something. It makes me wonder how I'd feel hearing that if I had no desire to have children.
6. Any two-piece outfit is out of the question, unless there's a stealthy way to swap the large bottoms to go with the small top without the cashier noticing, because no one wants to buy two sets of something just to fit into one.
7. Every pair of shorts you own unintentionally become booty shorts. I don't think people understand that I'm really not trying to show my ass off to the world. I have two options: buy a pair of shorts that comfortably covers my backside but completely falls off my waist, or buy a pair of shorts that fit my waist but hug my butt so that when I walk they start to ride up. Trust me, it's not a comfortable solution for anyone, but it's my only option.
8. Any form-fitting dress is a no-go (for me at least); I learned that the hard way. I wore this dress that I loved to a formal, and then I hated myself for wearing it once I saw the pictures from that night. I am pictured on the far right in the photo below; if I had any doubts I was a pear before I have no doubts now!
9. I dread the day that I get to go wedding dress shopping because my favorite styles are trumpet and mermaid, but I despise my hips. I'm not the princess type, but I feel like ballgowns and A-lines are my only options.
10. Every time I've asked a boyfriend what attracted him to me, his answer has been about my ass. It's understandable that I'd attract "ass guys" as opposed to "boob guys", but come on.
I guess on the bright side, the last few years have been idolizing big booties thanks to the Nicki Minajs and Kim Kardashians of the world. Except, there's my number 11. I don't want to be compared to Nicki Minaj or Kim Kardashian. It's been a struggle trying to love my body for what it is. Sure, I'll get on stage at karaoke night and kill a rendition of "Baby Got Back" convincing myself that I have something desirable. I'll pretend "Fat Bottom Girls" gives me confidence. I can let all the "ass guys" of the world feed my ego. In the end though, only you can decide to love yourself.
