It is damn near impossible for me to get out of bed before 10 a.m., let alone make it to a class that starts any time before that. I honestly don’t even know why colleges schedule classes before then anyway. You would think teachers would want me well rested, sitting at my desk, ready to learn, rather than falling asleep and drooling on my laptop. I know I probably shouldn’t be complaining about having to start my day at 9 a.m., but when you stay up until 3 a.m. every night binge-watching Netflix, it’s kind of hard to be fully functional at that time in the morning.
Let’s start off by discussing how the lateness occurs. Being slammed with schoolwork and extracurricular activities, it is a rare occurrence if I finish my necessary schoolwork before 11 p.m. Now, after working all day, naturally I just want to hang out with my friends and watch some mindless TV to get my mind off of my responsibilities. One thing leads to the next, and I find myself six episodes deep into "Teen Mom OG," wondering when Amber is going to b*tchslap Gary next. Finally, I manage to put myself to sleep, setting 13 alarms to make sure my lazy ass gets out of bed on time to make it to class (not so secretly knowing that will never happen).
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Needless to say, the next morning I hit the snooze button one too many times and end up finding myself with 15 minutes to shower, get dressed, and get to class. First up, brush my teeth because it honestly smells like I hung out with the homeless population of NYC eating legitimate garbage out of a dumpster. Should I shower? Or should I go to class looking like I just rolled out of bed? Definitely shower, I have plenty of time (12 minutes before class starts). Oh shit, now I have to pick out clothes to wear. Oh, no underwear left? Cool. Guess I’m doing laundry tonight. Five minutes later I finally manage to put on something about as presentable as a fat man wearing a full spandex outfit. Sh*t, class starts in a minute, guess I’m going to be late again. Well, since I’m already late, might as well run and grab a coffee to wake myself up. Eventually, I stroll into class 15 minutes late, take my seat, and try to avoid all of the awkward stares around the classroom. Yes, I am late. No, you don’t need to stare me down as I find an empty seat. Always arrive fashionably late, right?
Although I absolutely cannot stand people that move slowly and take forever to accomplish tasks, in the morning there is no way I am going anywhere fast. This undoubtedly adds to the long list of reasons I can never make it to class on time; however, there is just simply nothing I can do to avoid it. We’re told college is the time of our lives and to enjoy it while we can, therefore I will never give up the late night Netflix binges with my friends, even if that means being a few minutes late to class in the morning. Unless you’re offering me a ride to the nearest diner and chocolate chip pancakes, good luck seeing my face before 10 a.m.
