Meddling friends. Where is the line drawn when it comes to someone plastering themselves between your problems? In life there is a spectrum for nearly everything, from sexual orientation to views in politics. But many forget that there is a spectrum when it comes to friendship, and this is important. Where do the friends in your life lay on this spectrum of trust and self-involvement? One side is meant for the people that exist to entertain you and distract you from deeper issues in your life. You don’t seek their input and you keep them removed from your personal struggles. The other side of the spectrum is for the select number of people that understand exactly who you are. If you consider an individual your closest friend, your soulmate, you have probably placed them regally all the way on the right side. This type of friend will do anything with your best interest in mind and their decisions never fail to impress you. These people know exactly what to do and say to pull you out of a mood and put you in a better one. Then there are the people in the middle of the spectrum, which you sometimes confide in and connect with. But you do not expect them to protect you or accept every part of you. When somebody who has never proven their loyalty to you interjects themselves in your business, the feeling of regret that you ever let them in your life begins to settle.
If you treat your friends as you would a significant other, disregarding the physically intimate aspect of the relationship, and put the same amount of effort in, your friendships will never present you with the question “why am I still in this?” The “friends” on the left of the spectrum tread in shallow water. They struggle when it comes to gaining your trust and love. You have outgrown them but maybe you’re holding onto them because it’s convenient. Fake friends are the jellyfish in the pool of your companions. They’re slimy, transparent and sting you once you’re close. These are the fake fickle people that appeal to drama. If there is no drama in your life, they will find a way to conjure some up.
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If you ever have to question the intentions of someone in your life, they are not permanent company. Real friends respect distance and boundaries. Real friends can anticipate your response and reaction before they even act. Real friends know what to touch and what to leave be. It’s crucial to find that one person who knows how to read your mental blueprints and understands your tolerance to emotion. It is necessary to interact with those who know what is best for you. This is a cliché statement, I cringe writing it.
Those who have too many “best friends” reveal an ignorant disposition. Through experience, it is impossible to construct a pure relationship with more than a handful of people in less than a year. Everybody claims their own definition of what a best friend is. We all know that they are hard to come by, so if there seems to be an excessive amount, ones standard for a best friend should probably be raised.
