That one guy. You know the one. He's the one, probably not the one for life, but the one for some period of time in your life that will disappear and reappear more times than you can count on a single hand. Your relationship started out with sparks, somehow dimmed and came to an "end"...but not really the end. Sound familiar?
I'm not talking about committed relationships here, so you can shut down that thought track you're currently on. I've been one half of the couple that breaks up every other minute, only to get back together the next and confuse the living hell out of everyone around us. From that experience, I can tell you I'm not a huge fan of "those kinds." I'm talking about the fling that is, was, will be in the future...the one you just can't really put your finger on. The one that even when you think it's the actual end to the rendezvous, somehow he comes walking (sometimes crawling) back into your life and your knees fall weak to his antics every single time. So why do we do this? I have a few ideas.
1. There Was Never Any Real Closure
What is closure really when it comes to flings? In most cases, it's some slur of half sentences meant to awkwardly explain to each other with lame excuses that this probably isn't the best thing for the two of you. Then, you see them out a couple of weeks later and those giddy feelings magically return and history repeats itself somehow. If you really don't plan on having this person reinsert themselves into your life down the road, its time to figure out a better plan for ending it for good, rather than ending it for just a short while.
2. We Are Creatures Of Habit
When you've become so used to a person, how they make you feel, what they do for you and what you've missed while they were gone, you are inevitably bound to tangle yourself up in it all once again. It was a safe space at one time in your life and naturally, as humans, we may almost be magnetically pulled back because of that.
3. Your Indecisiveness
So you've been dating again and these new guys just aren't cutting it the way that one guy was, so you begin to think, and think, and think some more. You're probably not giving these new prospects free range to show you what they can do and what they can be for you because you're still indecisive about the last guy. Indecisiveness and dating is a lethal combination if you want anything to work out in the end.
4. The Loneliness Factor
Now, lets flip the situation from above. You haven't been dating since this last guy. He happens to call you up while you're sitting on the couch by yourself on a Friday night, eating a tub of ice cream with no other men at your beck-and-call, so what are you supposed to do? Odds are you're probably going to pick up the phone and see what he has planned for the two of you. Also, natural. Yet also, pathetic.
5. The Manipulation Factor
This is plain and simple; just crashing into someone's life because you want to see if you can still have them. Unfortunately, this is probably the most popular and common amongst egotistical young men who think everything in life is a competition or some kind of game. Run from this one.
6. The "You're The One" Epiphany
This is especially rare and isn't a title you should be throwing around to just anyone. I can almost guarantee you that this is not the reason you have a resurfacing fling, but if you really feel it in your bones, then go with it, I guess. If you can't imagine life without this person, maybe there's a reason you've been keeping them around.
All in all, we are all bound to have this one person. It's kind of inevitable if you are part of the modern dating scene, so study up, go forth and conquer it, kids!
