If you have not heard of the name “Harambe” right now, I am going to have to assume you live under a rock and are reading this article via the latest iStone Tablet. Okay okay, maybe you don’t know about the second coming of our Lord and Savior, so let me show you a picture of him.
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Harambe was a 17-year-old Western Lowland Gorilla, who was mercilessly shot by zookeepers after inattentive parents let their four-year-old son fall into the critically endangered specie’s exhibit. That’s the story that the whole world knows, but few know the truth behind Harambe – the greatest creature to ever live.
On May 27 1999, baby Harambe was brought into this world by his loving parents Kim and Kanye. Sadly, his birthplace was located in captivity where he would spend the rest of his very short life. As a toddler, Harambe loved to wander throughout his small enclosure and explore. He would frequent the glass windows and entertain the many zoo visitors. Once he was 7 years old, his mama told him, “go make yourself some friends or you’ll be lonely.” Thus, creating the gorilla he was until June of 2016.
The young Western Lowland Gorilla began making friends with some of the other primates, but he never felt wanted. He had always felt kind of left out. It might have had something to do with poachers ruthlessly killing his fellow species, but what do I know? I'm just the voice in your head as you read. Anyway, Harambe, trying to fit in with the older apes, would show off his tricks and skills.
One late summer night, a ruthless thunderstorm took over the skies. Harambe’s new friends dared him to do his awesome tricks in the mud. Excited to prove his talent, he agreed. In a quick swoop, Harambe leaped into the air off a nearby boulder. Catching him in mid-air, lightning struck the gorilla.
He hit the earth, causing a huge rumble. The earth cracked underneath his feet. Terrified, the other young apes scattered. “Wait!” Harambe called. He looked himself up and down. He was perfectly fine, but somehow different. A glow of light shined down from the heavens onto the youngster. Trying to squint up to see what was happening, the clouds parted.
th, 2016. The now 17 year old gorilla – his birthday being just a day before – was able to communicate with a four year old boy. They decided they needed to talk somewhere quietly, so the boy snuck passed his parents and two barriers before tumbling into the enclosure. Sadly, the plan did not go as expected, because the loud splash of the boy hitting the water caused attention.
Guests began freaking out. Harambe freaked, grabbed the child, and tried to make a run for it. The other gorillas listened to the zookeepers and ran into a holding cell. Trapped, Harambe threw his body in front of the boy to protect him. A loud blast went off.
Harambe fell to the ground. He had been shot in the chest. The boy held onto the bleeding gorilla, begging him to hold on.
“You must continue to spread the truth,” Harambe mumbled out before dying.
That is the story the news doesn’t want you to see. The real story about the Western Lowland gorilla who was shot for trying to protect us. Harambe did not just die for us.
He took a shot for us. Let’s take a shot for him. Preferably an alcoholic one.
