It's been seven weeks since you've been home. 49 days. 35 of those days you've been up past 1:30, and each of the seven weekends you've been out being #college. You have two papers due next week, a speech, and an exam coming up. It's official: you need to go home. You miss your parents and you definitely need a break. But you know how it goes, there are pros and cons to every decision, and deciding to go home has lots of both. Here they are:
Pro: As you're driving off campus, you let go of all of the school stress holding you down.
" Goodbye drama!" "So long douchebags!" "Ta-ta group projects!" *breathes sigh of relief*
Con: As you're driving off campus, you see all your friends going to Bagel Shop.
Let the FOMO begin.
Pro: There's nothing like that first "welcome home" hug.
And when your parents run down the steps to greet you it's just *that* much better.
Con: Once you get home and check your phone, the TGIF Snapchats start flooding in.
You're trying to focus on your parents, but your friends feel the need to keep reminding you that Champagne Breakfasts can start at 3pm, and it's pretty rowdy.
Pro: The minute you walk through the door, you're greeted by plates of cookies and a cozy couch calling your name.
Time for an all-you-can-eat snoozefest.
Con: Your all-you-can-eat snoozefest is quickly interrupted by your mom asking you to "run errands" with her.
You say yes, because you miss your mama, but this "quick trip" turns into a two hour excursion to every grocery store in town.
Pro: You might get to relive your glory days and go to your old high school's football game.
You own those bleachers. You're the queen/king of that field.
Con: It turns out, you're not actually the queen/king of the field because you don't know anyone on the team and definitely don't care about the high school or *eye roll* middle school relationships around you.
So instead of living it up at the concession stand, you stick with your parents and whisper snarky things about your old classmates in their ears.
Pro: As long as you didn't gain 70 pounds of beer weight in college, everyone tells you how great you look.
And if they don't, they're just jealous.
Con: For the sake of politeness, you have to scrounge up a compliment to reciprocate with, and fail.
"I love your... camo sweatshirt! Uh...watch out, deer! Ha HA!"
Pro: Everyone you run into also really cares how college is going (or pretends to).
It's nice feeling loved. It's also nice bragging about yourself.
Con: You have to say the same string of "it's great!", "It's going by so fast!", "I love it!" a million times.
At a certain point the answers just flow out automatically.
Pro: Your parents, if anything like mine, will make/buy you all of your favorite foods because you're so deprived at school.
This means homemade biscuits and gravy, people.
Con: All of this food you're shoving down your throat makes you feel like a whale.
So. Bloated.
Pro: You don't have to put effort into your appearance, since there's probably only three attractive people in your town and you're leaving in two days anyway.
Time to go all-natural. And by all-natural I mean look like a 12-year-old boy with under eye bags and greasy hair.
Con: When you go to breakfast looking all-natural with your parents, you run into all three attractive people.
And of course they all sit at the table next to you.
Pro: You get to cozy up next your parents in your favorite pajamas and watch old sitcoms.
Bonus points if it's actually on cable and not Netflix.
Con: While you're chillaxing on the couch, it just so happens to be the craziest party of the year on campus. OF COURSE.
Your friends not only decided to go to that one fraternity you always want to go to but never do, they stole a composite, did bath salts, met a local celebrity, and found the Holy Grail.
Pro: You get to dish to your mom about all of the cute guys that you've been talking to (hooked up with/are desperately trying to hook up with).
And she's always there to reassure you that they're not out of your league
Con: At this crazy party you're trying to forget about, your friend sends you a picture of your crush.
Because the <5 hours you get at school just aren't doing it for you.
Con: Your parents wake you up because they actually live normal, human hours.
Sleeping in until 11 is not an option because THERE'S STUFF TO DO!
Pro: If you're lucky, friends from other schools are on home visits too.
Cue the coffee dates, lingering hugs, and inside jokes.
Con: If you're unlucky (which you probably are), you run into everyone from your high school you weren't friends with.
"So... I saw on Facebook you have a baby on the way and still hate Obama?"
Pro: You actually get homework done.
No roommates, no Dutch Bros, no distractions.
Con: More often than not, you forget a textbook at school and can do nothing about it.
This leads to severe anxiety the whole weekend.
Pro: You get to spend quality time with your family
You go places, play games, eat good food, laugh a lot, reconnect, and try not to fight because your time at home is so short.
Con: You have the fact you're leaving in two days looming over your head the whole time.
And then your parents talk about how they wish you could stay and it makes you so much sadder.
Pro: At the end of it all, you get to go back to school.
You miss your friends, you miss putting a little effort into things, and you miss Taco Bell. It's time to head back to your kingdom.
Con: At the end of it all, you have to go back to school.
Time to say goodbye to quality (free) food, comfy beds, and saddest of all, your parents. But don't worry, only a few weeks until Thanksgiving break! Then you'll be back home. :)
