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The Procrastinator's Guide To Procrastination

Three tips from your friendly campus procrastinator who wants to succeed only a little less than everyone else.

Lacey Hickey

Jan 22, 2018

Oklahoma State

136

The Procrastinator's Guide To Procrastination

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I currently have one foot through the door of the beautiful Spring 2018 semester. Although the single-digit temperatures tempt me EVERY morning just to stay in bed, the little voice in my head whispering "get a 4.0" usually wins over. So, with a will-powered mindset, welcome to the procrastinator's guide to procrastination!

Pro Tip 1: Nap guide

ALWAYS make sure you start your work before you take a nap. Falling asleep with a book in your bed usually helps make yourself feel like you at least attempted to do something productive.

Pro Tip 2: Set alarms

If you are planning on napping or relaxing for a bit of time, make sure you set some alarms. These will sound and tell you when it is time to get down to business. Sometimes you just silence them and continue napping, but at least you set them in the first place, right?

Pro Tip 3: The final key

Self-encouragement! Reward yourself for reading a chapter with, like, 5,000 calories of snacks, a long food-coma nap and maybe some Netflix as well. It is ALL about self-motivation!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The Procrastinator's Guide To Procrastination

Three tips from your friendly campus procrastinator who wants to succeed only a little less than everyone else.

Pro Tip 1: Nap guide

Pro Tip 2: Set alarms

Pro Tip 3: The final key

Subscribe to our Newsletter

The Belchers hold the key to a better life.

#Adulting is hard.

1. Taking care of yourself when you're sick

2. Making a to-do list

3. Planning your activities around the weather

4. Scheduling your own doctor’s appointments

5. Getting your own toilet paper

6. Making food without needing to ask your mom questions

7. Holding your tongue

8. Saving your paycheck (or your tax refund) to pay your bills

9. Balancing your checkbook

10. Going places alone

11. Packing your own lunches

12. Actually eating your vegetables...on purpose

13. Taking a multivitamin

14. Planning a life after graduation

Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

2. Never getting to be invisible

3. Knowing every single thing about every single person in the town

4. New kids are a big deal

5. It’s hard to make new friends

6. On that note ... the dating pool is even smaller!

7. Teachers are weirdly close to their students

8. It forced you to make friends out of school

"I'm hopeless and awkward and desperate for love"

1. That Time He Tested Out His Flirting Skills and This Happened

2. When He Was Willing to Do Anything to Avoid Confrontation

3. When He Couldn't Handle Awkward, Emotional Situations

4. How He Reacted Whenever His Friends Ignored Him

5. All of the Times He Worried About His Failing Love Life

6. Whenever He Tried to Whip Himself Into Shape

7. How He Handled New People and New Experiences

8. Whenever His Friends Got Annoying, He Was Always the Voice of Reason

9. He Always Knew How to Jam

10. He Finds a Way to Make Any Situation More Fun

No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

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