You've probably heard of many texting "rules" most likely voiced from a younger person: "I have to wait fiveG minutes to text her back" or "he texts back super slow, he must not like me." This is not to say that all younger people are like this, but it wasn't until the rise of social media that there started to be a trend.
As a 21-year-old woman, I can admit that I was heavily influenced by the doing of others and what was popular at the time that I was a teenager. I probably didn't shake things off like that until I found out that I was becoming a product of everything I saw. I hated it. I was probably "18 going on 19" when I actively told myself to quit it and to stop being so easily tainted. God didn't make me to be like this! Plus, I will say that your perspective changes a lot when you become a follower of Christ. A lot of your point of views are changed due to that, however, here I am going to tell you why there's lots of problems with the fact that many believe that texting insinuates this or that.
There's an impression first that one must wait to text back to refrain from seeming "desperate" when engaging in conversation with somebody they like. It may not be a must but it is something many young people I know, think hard about doing when newly texting someone. The root of this is relying so heavily on making a good presentation of themselves, meaning they feel their significance is added up by what this person thinks of them. What would cause it to go negatively very quick is seeming eager or desperate instead of laid back or casual when engaging in conversation with them. To seem casual means resorting to wait just a bit to text back.
Honestly, the bigger issue behind this is not only the fact that there is so much meaning put behind every move made when texting (among the other popular activities) or the obsession with seeming one way rather than another or even that technology is taking away the organic factor from everything that it is substituting itself for.
I believe that what motivates all of this in people is fear. There's this cloak that folds itself over the whole topic of this. At the end of the day there's this bigger fear of not having feelings or actions reciprocated so one feels to only reciprocate the exact amount of energy put into a friendship or relationship. That we have to wait to see how much the other person is going to put out on the table before we can put what we have on the table as well. This ends up making us hold back or become attentive of not adding anything else but instead match it exactly for what it is. Say that there's nothing being put on the table from the other person, well then guess what we decide to put on it. Probably a note that says, "I don't have time for someone that isn't willing to try. Goodbye." That candle then burns out and we pursue our every relationship in this manner.
However, holding back takes away from our individualism. To be who we genuinely are because it isn't "fair" or we "deserve" much better than someone that. This is only another circumstance where we are tainted because of the matter of outside factors. You get lost in all of that out of fear of not getting anything back or "enough." Trust me when I tell you, this only hurts you instead of benefits you.
Personally, as a follower of Christ, I know that we are called to a higher purpose. We are to leave ourselves completely out of the equation and serve God and people and Honor him by caring for His creations. We cannot do this if we are worried about ourselves and how we are going to be treated. Our number one job is to spread the Gospel and we cannot do that with the fear of seeming this way or that way. The only thing certain is that we have to Love and Love has no risk or border. We love and we are to love hard and everyone. In order for that to happen, it takes becoming selfless and having zero concern about our "desires" to be fulfilled as a flesh that wants everything reciprocated in whatever form and x amount.
I want to challenge you with your relationships, especially those that you feel are closing up or are somewhat non-existent. Reach out and love on them today. Leave yourself out of it and love on them as Jesus would/does.
How do you feel about this? Do you too believe that there is too much meaning but behind texting? How so? What are some other things that taint people to believe something other than the simplicity of the doing? Do you think people are scared of vulnerability?
