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Health and Wellness

The Problem Solver

I've always been the counselor.

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The Problem Solver
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People naturally come to me with their problems. Why, I don't know, but they do.

Whether it's family, work, school, friends, relationships, they never fail to come to me.

For years now, I've put everyone before myself, protecting them, solving their problems.

It all started when I found out my dad was cheating on my mom, I didn't tell her. I kept it inside me for a year and a half. It shredded around inside me, preventing me from doing things I loved, but it never left. I didn't want my mom to hurt. She found out on her own, and would come to me when she was upset or wanted my thoughts on things, and again, I'm not sure why.

My friends used to call me the counselor. They'd ask to talk and I'd give them my advice, and then they'd come back telling me about how well it worked and how thankful they are.

My boyfriend's ignoring me, my parents are arguing, I hate my family, I like a guy, I like a girl, I want to break up with my girlfriend but I don't know how, I want to die, I'm still in love with my ex and I'd do anything for him even though he hurts me every single time.

My mind is constantly riddled with different issues that aren't mine but I insist I need to solve.

I'm a very quiet person. My family will tell you differently, but in public I'm very quiet. I spend my days deciphering how people work, getting into their heads, observing their actions, listening to them. I know how the girl in my math class wraps her hair around her thumb and bites it when she's thinking. I know how my friends in my foods class isolate themselves when something is wrong, when something is bothering them.

I'm always in a state of trying to solve others' issues.

Maybe your boyfriend is ignoring you because he's planning a surprise visit. He was.

Your parents are arguing a lot because of medication one of them is taking. It was.

You aren't required to love your family, but they are the only family you have. It's their job to bother and pester you.

If you like someone, let them know. Hint at it.

If you want to break up, you need to be straight forward and honest about it. Don't lie to make it hurt less.

Don't give up on your life before it's even started. Life is a precious thing, and you only have one life. There's a world of things to experience before it's even relatively close to your time to go.

Fuck your ex. He's a dickhead. Let's go cut his groins off and kill him. (Not really, but it made you laugh, didn't it?)

I've been doing this for years, but I'm tired.

I'm so, so tired. I can give you what you consider the best advice you've had, but I can't give myself advice. I put everyone before me.

I've decided I can't do that anymore.

I've come to realize I can't solve everyone's problems. I can try my whole life, but I can't.

I'm late to make that decision, but I refuse to do it anymore. Yes, I love you guys. I truly, truly love you, but you cannot get mad at me anymore for putting myself first for the first time in a long time. You've all said it. Even my best friend has said it to me. I've changed. It's like I don't care anymore.

You're not wrong. I do care. I have changed. There have been many times where I've needed someone and you've all said, something along the lines of "Aww, I'm sorry :(" or you've just skipped right over it into a problem you need help with.

I need to take care of me before I can take care of you.

Now, don't get me wrong, you can still come to me. You always can, I'll always be here, but if I'm dealing with something, I need to do me before I can do you, but I will always be here to guide you in your dark times.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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