The Price You Pay for Being Successful in the Black Community
How Wanting to be successful affects how other see you.
You know that phrase "Everyone wants to be successful"? Well apparently that isn't true, most people want to just get by. As African Americans, we are not well represented when it comes to high achievements. The negatives are always what is shown in the media, not the positives. You would think that the people in our community would want you to do better right? Wrong, we are still making fun of those kids who are over-achievers, we still make others feel bad for wanting to do well.
I remember when I was in high school, it was relatively easy to do well. I never liked anything below a B+. One day our report cards came out and had all A's and one B- which put my GPA at 4.3. I really worked hard. Don't get me wrong 4.3 is a GREAT GPA, I still wanted all A's, that was my goal and that is what I was working towards. So a person who asked to see my report card took it and was showing everyone. One particular person called out and said, "she think she better than everyone because she got a 4.3". All I could do was raise my eyebrow in question. I didn't understand how she came to that conclusion so I just brushed it off.
The same day we had to give all report cards to my basketball coach and my coach was like a 2nd dad to me. He was telling me how that B- needs to be an A, and I was like yeah I'm kind of upset about that because I was so close. Another girl says "seriously stop complaining about it and just be glad you passed, some of us didn't. I hate when people complain about that!". This time, I did reply because how is it my fault that others didn't do their work so they failed? How are you mad at me for wanting to do more than just try to get by? What does my success have to do with you? I was so frustrated that people expected me to be mediocre, that's just not me personally. We should want to uplift and up-build each other. There is enough belittlement of out character as it is, why add more?
It reminds me of the episode of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, where Carlton and Will were trying to get into the fraternity and since Carlton wasn't as urban or "down with the struggle" as will he didn't get in. He was denied because he came from a more affluent background so he apparently knows nothing of brotherhood. He was called a sellout because of how he talked and how he dressed and how he was so dedicated to succeeding. I remember this episode when I was little and I only realized how real this was when I got in high school and saw how people treated you for wanting to be successful. I noticed how everyone equates talking right to talking white like you can't be grammatically correct. It's a shame really. Think about it the next time you want to make fun of someone for wanting to succeed, for choosing to study and work before choosing to party and hanging out, for the way they talk, for how they dress, etc. Wanting to be successful, you run the risk of being called a sellout or people thinking you're better than them, jealousy and envy and the list goes on. You have kids scared to constantly raise their hands in class so they won't seem like nerds or they're trying too hard. People don't want to succeed anymore because it is now seen as uncool. You should never feel or be belittled for wanting to do good.
The overall message is that we should want to challenge each other and push each other to go further. We aren't seen in a positive light in the media so we should want to create positive images of our community by encouraging others who are trying to give us a positive look. There is no reason for the self-hate so be positive and encouraging. If you see someone wanting to over achieve with everything they do you should give praise and take note that nothing in life is accomplished by just getting by. The most remembered people went above and behind so why shouldn't I?
"It is our duty to fight for our freedom, to win. WE MUST LOVE EACH OTHER AND SUPPORT EACH OTHER. We have nothing to lose but our chains." - Assata Shakur