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The Post-Breakup Drinking Game: A Poem

Take a drink.

Cole Stolte

Nov 06, 2018

The State University of New York at Stony Brook

501

Instagram

Take a drink

Every time you see or hear her name.

Take a drink

Every time she messages you.

Take a drink

Every time you want to message her.

Take a drink

Every time she tries to act like a friend.

Take a drink

Every time you ask her not to.

Take a drink

Every time you cry over her.

Take a drink

Every time she doesn't cry over you.

Take a drink

Every time you think of her.

Take a drink

Every time she doesn't think of you.

Take a drink

Every time you think.

When she kisses another boy,

Drink.

When she acts like she didn't do anything,

Drink.

When she selfishly tries to stay in your life,

Drink.

When she makes you uncomfortable,

Drink.

When she talks about her dates,

Drink.

When she won't let you heal,

Drink.

When she ignores your pleas,

Drink.

When she says she's done nothing wrong,

Drink.

When she tries to justify cheating,

Drink.

When she lives her life without you,

Drink.

Every time you take a drink,

Take another drink.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The Post-Breakup Drinking Game: A Poem

Take a drink.

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We get it — we're frustrated with you, too.

1. When they go out of their way to help you.

2. When they are cleaning up a section of the store.

3. When they deal with your children being heathens.

4. When they listen intently to your coupon problems.

5. When they ask you about opening a credit card or rewards card.

6. When you have to wait to get an item number or to talk to a manager.

It's not always fun being fun-sized!

1. Not wearing makeup is like stepping in a time machine

2. "Wow, how tall are you?!"

3. You don't realize how much you're craning your neck until you talk to someone as short as you.

4. Hugging your friends is just asking for a face full of boob for you and makeup on their shirt for them. Awkward.

5. You face retail discrimination

Details the INFJ may not have wanted to let you know about.

1. Their moral compass is the strongest bone in their bodies

2. They like getting a mild cold

3. They can only make one new friend at a time

4. They can only be leaders if they're experts on the topic

5. You know what too nice means: Fake

6. Their creativity comes out in strange bouts

7. They like heavily emotional stories

8. They experience a different kind of tired

9. Structure and routine is the name of the game

10. They are sensitive little creatures

11. They love to love

12. Yup, they’re the mom of the friend group

It's a daily struggle to make it on time, but everyone has those days where they just...don't.

1. "Oh, crap..."

2. "Is it worth it?"

3. "Why is this room so cold?"

4. "Does this professor grade attendance?"

5. "Can I wear my pajamas to class?"

6. "Do I have time to brush my teeth?"

6. "Shoot, I didn't finish my homework..."

7. "What's the weather supposed to be today?"

8. "Will the bus be on time?"

9. "How can I enter the room in the least obtrusive way possible?"

10. "WHY didn't anyone leave a seat on the end in case someone came late?!"

11. "Does this professor hate me now?"

12. "I'll be early next class..."

Getting hung up on is my super power.

1. The first call is the hardest

2. Getting hung up on before you say something

3. People don't live forever

4. It's exhausting

5. Getting hung up on the second you say where you're calling from

6. People will say anything to get you off the phone

7. Voicemails are weird

8. No one cleans out their mailbox

9. Pronouncing names correctly can be hard

10. People are mean

11. Some calls make it worth it

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