Nobody is happy with who they are all the time. There will always be times when we are unhappy with the way we look, the grades we’re getting, the work we’re doing. There will always be people we compare ourselves to until we feel inadequate in just about every aspect of life. Sometimes we spread ourselves so thin trying to improve ourselves and make an impact on the world that we can barely hold ourselves together. However, for me, and I hope for everyone else, there is at least one person who is kind enough to be there and love you when you are unable to love yourself. This is an open letter to the person who was there for me.
I am sorry. I know how hard it can be to be around someone when they are in a dark and negative place. There have been times when going through those dark phases cost me my relationships that I thought were built to last. Unfortunately, not everyone has the heart that you do to stick with the person you love through the roughest of times. And like they say, “if you can’t handle me at my worst, then you don’t deserve me at my best.” That was the case with a lot of people in my life. But you, my friend, definitely deserve me at my best, because you have seen my at my worst and not only handled or dealt with it; you guided me through it every step of the way.
Thank you. Thank you for not giving up on me when I had given up on myself. Thank you for encouraging me to keep going when I felt all hope was lost and that there was nothing more I could do. Thank you for listening to my rants about never being good enough, and giving me reassurance that I am. There aren’t enough ways that I could thank you for the words of reassurance, nights spent hugging me and letting me cry (sometimes for no reason at all), and making me laugh when I was half convinced that my world was coming to an end. There are not a lot of people who have the ability to do that or the heart to even try. The little things you did for me really added up and pushed me towards the light at the end of a long, dark tunnel. Thank you for being there.
Finally, I want you to know that I will always reciprocate the love and kindness you gave to me when I needed it most. Never think that I won’t be there for you the way you were for me. Always remember that you don’t have to go through anything alone. I will be by your side through thick and thin. Whether you want my help or not, my hand will always be there if you need someone to pull you through. Know that even when you don’t love yourself, I love you. And as you once said to me, I love you enough for the both of us.