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The Oxford Comma

Use it.

Jun 21, 2016

The Oxford comma is one of the most essential tools that a good writer utilizes. By incorporating this simple punctuation mark into their writing, people can clarify the messages that they try to convey. This one, simple comma can help them avoid sounding completely illiterate.

I have taken an oath to use, defend, and protect the Oxford comma.

To help convince others to do the same, here are some examples of the mistakes that the Oxford comma can easily be used to prevent:

1. "My heroes are my parents, Superman and Batman."

Although it would be quite an incredible household to live in, I really doubt that the Man of Steel took the time to adopt a child with the Dark Knight. But how awesome would that be?! No boyfriend would ever come close to breaking their daughter's heart, Superman could fly everyone around when gas prices get too high, and Batman would always have the coolest toys to play with!

2. I wonder if Michelle knows about this...

The Obama-Castro same-sex marriage has been set, and I could not be more excited! This was a bit unexpected though. California started issuing same-sex marriage licenses, and Barack reacted much faster than I expected. And here I was, thinking that the Obamas were one of the most amazing power couples of our time.

3. Facebook post: "watchen lil sis shower then family guy marathon :D"

Whoa whoa whoa whoa... TIMEOUT! This man needs to start checking what he posts before he ends up in jail. Let's hope that he was "watching his little sister, showered, and then got to watch a family guy marathon." You have to wonder how many people unfriended him for this...

4. At least one of these descriptions is false.

Being the President of South Africa, a Nobel Peace Prize recipient, and a civil rights activist makes Nelson Mandela one of the most influential people to ever walk this earth. But his secret life as an 800-year old demigod is probably the most impressive thing about him. And having that many years to collect, there must have been so many dildos!

It is astounding to see how much of a difference one comma can make. But for reasons which I can make no sense of, the Oxford comma is not accepted throughout all forms of writing.

This must change!

Without this crucial piece of punctuation, the world is left to tragic misinterpretations of news. And this puts us all at risk!

For this reason, I stand by my word. Until the day that I die, I will use, defend, and protect the Oxford comma.

I invite you to do the same.

#LongLiveTheOxfordComma

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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The Oxford Comma

Use it.

1. "My heroes are my parents, Superman and Batman."

2. I wonder if Michelle knows about this...

3. Facebook post: "watchen lil sis shower then family guy marathon :D"

4. At least one of these descriptions is false.

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Sleepovers are not a thing. They're just not.

1. You only ask things once.

2. Seriously, you only ask once.

3. When you do muster up the courage to ask your parents for something, you creep around and wait until they’re in a good mood.

4. Before you get that final yes, you have to go through an interview.

5. If you ever got “the eye,” you knew you were screwed.

6. You were always the first to leave your group of friends when hanging out.

7. If you say you will be home at a certain time, you better be home at that time.

8. Seeing a missed call from your parents sends fear and horror through your veins.

9. If relatives are coming over to the house, your room better be clean.

10. You are careful about what jokes you share with your parents.

11. "You’re not an adult until you turn 18! You can do whatever you want then!"

12. If plans change while you’re out, you better text or call.

13. Don’t talk back. Ever.

14. When you’re called by your full name, you’re in deep trouble.

15. Don’t make them call your name twice.

16. Sleepovers are not a thing.

17. Despite all of these things, you know your parents love you.

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No, really. I'm not mad. Just hungry.

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2. You’re constantly using the excuse, “I’m just tired” when people ask you if you’re mad.

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5. But when you are, people usually can’t tell.

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Some of your best ideas come through boredom.

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