"Nobody likes you when you're 23"
- Blink 182

And believe the words to the rhyme. Nobody does. Once you've hit 23, max, the world officially has given up on handing you the opportunity to make it. The spiral now begins to rotate in it's spin and the only direction available is for you to break it...if you don't have a plan.

Thankfully enough, not everyone turns their back on you or withdraws their hands of help once you hit 18 or the dreadful 21. Luckily for you, there's just a little extra time to make something worthy of yourself in this dog eat dog world. But the question is not of "will you make it?" more so than it is a question of "how will you make it" and/or "how soon?"

Let's be honest with ourselves, the overwhelming majority of the population specifically Americans just want to have a good time, all the time. From sitting in your underwear on a casual Saturday morning at the age of 11 watching "Hey Arnold" or playing "Donkey Kong 64," to coming home from middle school and ditching homework to catch a curfew intercepting edition of Monday Night Raw, to putting all forward focus of your attention aside from accumulating high school credits to give your all to a girl or two who doesn't even have your back 100 percent, and finally towards giving college only one year of your time before completely throwing your hands up in the air and just going with the flow of a current that isn't pumping anything except for burning out your bank account spendings on rock concerts.

Of course - I am speaking in true example of myself.

Main message is, no matter how the road in front of us may appear, whether it calls for our immediate attention to put the grown up pants and make the most plausible decisions - we always want to have fun.

We NEVER want to grow up. None of us.

Hence the reason why we try our hardest in the times of dire necessity timing of change to preserve the youth of today and continue to put it off til tomorrow, and the next day.
This is me. High school. 10th grade. Nothing more but a practical clown of my own design. Always out to make the next person get a chuckle rather than have higher up eyes look my direction with interest. Ongoing for many years, sourcing since 7th grade, completely disregarding the future coming forward, all that mattered to me was living in the moment while getting by every challenge or deal of responsibility by the skin of my teeth.

Upon not only repeating my senior year but also finally graduating high school, I realized through the many friends who disbanded from my side either through shame of association or focus for their fore-coming future that change was probably destined to come. I hadn't always procured a vision in my mind of what I wanted to do after high school however I knew that somewhere down the line I wanted to be successful with taking on the role of a career that I would not only benefit in my long run, but one of which I would have fun with. However, tussling from my younger years of trying to avoid anything that had to do with a classroom setting, put my one track mind at the time to believe College was not the answer.

.....But I gave it a shot anyway.

My first official day of college, I felt a wave of emotion overcome my mental state as I had assumed I had finally made it. Surrounded by older adults in my classes more so than those of my age, addressing the instructor by professor and not Mr or Ms, and overall having the control of my progress without feeling any sense of pressure by those in charge. It felt great because it felt like I'd finally reached where I needed to be in life.

Wrong.

Like any other average individual fresh out of high school, all I cared about once entering a campus rather than a school yard was make shifting my tactics that could slip me through the cracks just as easier than times past. Bad mistake on my end, I stretched my game way too far.

For the old saying that goes "they already have your money, so whether you choose to show up and take it seriously is not their care, more than it should be yours," I certainly overstayed my welcome to that line for every other day I'd pull out mistakes that I foolishly thought wouldn't make a difference in my collegial tenure. From skipping class to sleep in the library, leaving a lecture shortly on "emergency leave" just so that I may go swipe a burrito and peach iced tea from the cafeteria and to simply not show up anywhere near a campus because of rock concerts calling my name, I poorly assumed that it'd be easy game to bounce back before the semester took it's leave.

AND SO, came the F, F, F, F and B+. Foolishly confused of my own design catching up to me, not once, but twice in my only year attending of college, I dropped out without a second thought, failing to accept responsibility for my ill-witted faults, blaming those, who were only trying to elevate me, for being too strict or not understanding me. Additionally failing to realize I didn't need to be understood, I just needed to shut up and go with the flow.

Over the course of my then absent occupation of having nothing going for me, making excuses as to why I could not get hired to any store at the nearby mall of 50, or any of the several hundred stores and small businesses in the Manhattan area, I used my free leisure time for the duration of 2014 to use my financial aid money to live the high life of attending tons of rock concerts, acquiring tattoos and part taking in online shopping tons of knick knacks I so did not need.

After a while, the lack of making a name for myself, none the less providing a blank set of pages on my day to day schedule as I continued to grow older, I had honestly become tired of the same old song and dance. I really wanted to take matters more seriously. I wanted to make my Mother proud of me. I wanted to evade becoming a waste of space and ending up on the streets begging for money on the subway as I see quite often.

I finally wanted take charge of my life.

I wanted to grow up.

I applied to a vocational school in early Summer of 2015. With no initial plan at mind of what exactly I wanted to hone my craft in, I decided to take a chance in what was the most conceivable to not only my liking but of what seemed durable to my standard.

There I stood. Head held high, confidence levels oozing with the will to push forward and finally break out of being the boy and become the man. With the One World Trade Center in the distance resting on my shoulders, I pieced it's significance of once so down low, but yet rebuilt more stronger, to my own path to glory.

The only way from here is up!
It's time I stopped existing and started living.
My life begins today.

For the majority of the Summer, I studied up and took classes in the field of Human Services. Learning practices of how to assist the less fortunate groups in society such as those homeless, those battling depression, addictions or several types of mental illnesses and how to assist families in their search for financial, emotional, physical and mental stability. For these several months, I learned more and more about not only the way many different walks of life may appear but I also learned a lot about myself. I finally learned just what it meant to be accountable and diligent for making my time worthy in becoming an ambitious individual rather than just another face.

Although paying my dues towards walking the path to success, my efforts fell short for I still lacked stability in my aspects of remaining respectful and wise. Although learning the craft throughout the summer, it was not enough for me to power forward to the next lane of my voyage as I was booted from the practice when getting into a verbal confrontation with a director.

Stupid move. I thought.

In my mind, I had really done it now. I shot myself in the foot on any chance I had left to advance.

That is until several months later, a new unforeseeable opportunity that seemed like a dim void filler came about. Little did I know, it would be the beginning of the change I'd been clamoring for.

I gained employment in a restaurant chain called Potbelly. There I met some of the most friendliest and soon to be helpful people that I've known in quite some time. For months upon months, sided by a manager and a crew who always aimed not just to have a good time while we prepared hot sandwiches for customers, but were always about the idea of teaching one another of lessons that may assist each of us in a different walk of life to come. Additionally, unsuspected by a long shot, I managed to improve the two aspects I lacked heavily: being respectful and remaining wise.

For the 10 months that I worked at such a service, I went from

"What's up dude, what you need?" to "Hello sir/ma'am how can I help you?"
"iight, later" to "Enjoy your weekend sir/ma'am"
"That's what's up. Keep it smooth" to "Thank you sir/ma'am, have a nice day"

Not in only the manner of dealing with customers but additionally everywhere that I went, my respectful rates never diminished, for I had learned what it meant to respect as an adult by receiving it from fellow adults themselves.

Here I am. 10 months after learning many lessons of life and about myself. A former employee of Potbelly Sandwich Works. Why? You ask?

Let's just say through the huge assist of not only those who believed in me, gone to bat for me and have pushed me further than my regular skill helped me land the winning side of "make it or break it". With all of my failures, short-comings, lessons, revaluations, experiences, mindset shifts and of course, hard work, my journey has opened such a door to have landed me here:

It's time I started living.