Unfotunately you can never prepare for losing a close family member or a friend. What you can do is remember the precious memories you have with that person and celebrate their life. When I was 14 years old I lost a very close friend. I have many memories of her but one thing I'd like to thank her for is for teaching me how to live.
While alive she had the brightest personality, seriously drop dead gorgeous, and crazy talented on the field. When she walked into a room it lit up because she was simply "the life of the party". I swear she didn't know a stranger. When it all happened I was young and didn't understand what or why this was happening, quite honestly I still don't but now that I am older I feel like she gave me a new perspective on life. Lord knows I never wanted to learn it this way but it is another reminder every day that she did not die in vein.
Be kind. One of the things she taught me was that you never know what someone is going through. I truly believe that being kind can go a long way. You don't have to ask everyone you see about their life story but a simple," hello" and a smile might make their day a little better. It may be the worst day of their lives and I don't understand why you'd want to be apart of making it any worse. Something I try to do everyday is compliment someone. It seems silly but seeing someone smile is one of the best feelings. Who knows? Maybe you'll make someone's day. She taught me that being kind can go a long way. I think some people are so absorbed with themselves and what problems are going on in their owns lives that they fail to even acknowledge how they interact with others. Also remember it isn't always what you say, it's how you say it. So take the time to hold the door, say thank you, and smile a little more.
Take chances. I've written articles about living life right, having fun, making sure you do anything and everything you can and the reason I think that way is because of her. I was 14 when she passed so I didn't even know what living really was. I knew softball, school, and friends. Shoot, I couldn't even drive a car yet. Now that I'm older I'm in college, I play ball still, but I also enjoy traveling. I wouldn't say I'm this crazy outgoing person but I try to always do something that is out of my comfort zone. I feel that taking chances helps me grow and mature. When I say take chances and be spontaneous it doesn't mean go sky diving or go on expensive trips. Taking chances can be as small as going on a first date with someone new or moving to a place of your own. There's no limitations to the chances one can take. If you're scared of taking chances, take a friend with you. My best friend helps me be a little more spontaneous so there's no shame in having a buddy. Being older I'm finally realizing the freedom I have in life and I can't wait to see where taking chances gets me.
Whatever it is, you can get through it. Some days are harder than others and it seems impossible to get through but I promise you will. Being surrounded by friends and family, keeping busy, and prayer helps me tremendously. Sometimes when things get to be too much I just need to be alone and listen to music or write. Everyone has their thing they do but I promise there is something. I was speaking with someone the other day and they told me a story that really reminded me of how I feel about life. They said this," A man saw a butterfly trying to push its way out of a cocoon and their was some gooey substance on the cocoon that was preventing the butterfly from getting out. The man wiped the substance off and when the butterfly got out, it died. He later asked his friend why this happened. His friend said that the butterflies have to push out of the cocoons on their own because it's how they strengthen their wings." To live a successful life, you need struggle. There is something about making it through all the crap and standing up tall that is so empowering.
There's no doubt in my mind that my friend would've been anything but successful. I hope that this touches someone's heart and helps them in anyway the she has helped me.
Be Kind•Take Chances•You'll Get Through It.
So thank you, thank you to the one that taught me how to live.