Disclaimer: This article was co-authored with Madison Knapp.
Sorority recruitment is full of ups and downs, and for a PNM (potential new member), the week might be full of unanswered questions and tears. Why did that house drop me? Was my dress not good enough? Did I not talk to the right people? Was it a mistake? Next thing you know, you're in your Gamma Chi's arms crying about something that might've been. But remember this: those girls may have not seen what the other houses saw in you.
After preference, you might have a strong feeling that you will be running home to your number one house the next day, and for many girls, that dream becomes a reality. But for some, that number two house is the house they get a bid from the next day. Now I was never that girl. I knew which house was mine by day two. But I have plenty of friends that would say something completely different. And on bid day, you might be upset and you might even cry, but remember this one thing: your number one house didn't see the same thing your number two house might have, and that is okay.
Just because you feel comfortably in a home does not mean that those girls absolutely have to be your sisters and life-long friends. One of my best friends in my chapter did not want to run home to our chapter. But she signed her bid and is now taking on leadership roles. She has become one of the best sisters we have in the chapter. But when I met her on bid day, she was beyond upset that she was running home to her second choice. But throughout our new member period, she learned that she felt more comfortable in our house than she ever did in her first choice.
You may think that I don't know what I'm talking about, but I honestly do. The house I thought I would be running home to cut me after day one. I was hurt, but I still held my head high and realized that these other chapters that kept me saw something in me that that chapter simply looked over. And now the girls in that chapter have become some of my closest friends. Just because you didn't get a bid to join their sisterhood doesn't mean you can't be friends with them.
Recruitment is stressful enough without crying over the houses that didn't ask you to come back. Yes, it hurts and yes, you might like them, but that doesn't mean that you should drop out of recruitment or decline the bid your second house gave you. If I could give a PNM any piece of advice, it would be this: accept your bid from your second choice because at the end of the day, although you didn't choose them, they chose you.
