Netflix-and-chill, friends with benefits, no-strings-attached, F buddies: These are just a few of the terms that our younger generation gives their so called “relationships” these days. It seems that, especially in a college atmosphere, the majority of people only want a physical relationship. People are unwilling to put themselves out there emotionally. It is sad that if a guy is “too” sweet to his girl, he is referred to as whipped, not as a gentleman.

Our society has devalued the idea of monogamy and love, and a lot of the older generations are wondering why? So, what exactly has happened to chivalry and commitment? Why does our generation not go on dates anymore? And of course, how can we expect marriages these days to succeed if there is no emotion foundation? But most of all, why does the younger generation support such types of relationships? As an individual caught in the midst of this generation, I hope to provide some insight to these questions.

1. What has happened to chivalry and commitment?

Personally, I believe that the younger generation is caught up in the media that impresses bachelors and sexually crazy individuals. The media today glorifies sex. Magazines today eulogizes individuals that get their fame from sleeping around, such as the Kim Kardashian. Songs boost the idea of meaningless and demeaning sex, especially rap music that implies that sex is something that is so casual that it is to be expected. Plus, since we are now constantly surrounded by media on our phones, we are forced to see this type of lifestyle daily.

Media and artists promote dysfunctional relationships that our generation follows. It seems that most guys’ goal in college is to get with as many girls as possible, and since recent media demeans women, girls have accepted this treatment and act accordingly. Why try to act nicely and win over someone's heart when we have been taught to search for a physical short-term attraction and then move on quickly? The hookup culture does not have time for chivalry and commitment because a person hooks up with one person one day and a different person the next. A day is not long enough to build any relationship, except a physical one.

2. Why does our generation not go on dates anymore?

As babies of the 90’s and 00’s, we grew up with our faces in phones and computers. Compared to our parents, we do not socialize the same way. We do not talk face to face, we text, tweet, and fabricate our lives with plush social media. Even when I go out to lunch with my friends, no one talks. We all stare at our phones checking exactly how many likes our recent Instagram received. Therefore, how do we expect to sit across from a random person for an hour and actually get to know them? Might as well as sit in front of a T.V. or a computer and watch Netflix because, as a human race, our socializing skills have dramatically decreased.

3. How can we expect marriages these days to succeed if there is no emotional foundation?

We can not expect marriages to flourish these days. Simple enough. If we have grown up accepting that a different sexual partner every weekend is normal, how does anyone expect us to remain faithful for our entire lives? Today’s society does not impress the importance of commitment. If a relationship gets hard, people break up and find someone new immediately for a simple, physical relationship. Our grandparents used to fight for relationships when things got hard. However, we would rather just move on to the next option. Plus, since so many individuals refuse to enter a committed relationship, there is now a larger group of people to “date” at every age range. Being single is the newest in. As a generation, we seem to believe that if we have normal friends and a friend with benefits, why bother putting effort into a committed relationship?

4. Why does the younger generation support such types of relationships?

It is true, a large majority of people in my generation are looking for something casual, with no strings. I have heard many reasons for why we support such a non-loving type of relationship. Firstly, we do not have to emotionally put ourselves in harm’s way. If a relationship is purely physical, and the people have no feeling for each other, then they can receive their sexual needs and desires without having to risk a broken heart. Secondly, people believe that it creates more equality between the genders. In college, it is just a common for a guy to sleep with a whole slew of people as it is for a girl to sleep with the same amount.

However, the stigma that follows the number of sex partners between genders still lingers. A guy is applauded for sleeping with a girl and her best friend, but, if a girl slept with a guy and his best friend, she would be deemed a slut or loose. Lastly, it is convenient. A little flirting and a few drinks later, most people expect some sort of sexual act. All one has to do is step out of their house or just text a friend and boom: sex. There is no trying, no wooing, no romantic gestures. It’s just plain simple.

Although the hookup cultural may seem to make up our entire generation, it is not for everyone. Not everyone is having meaningless sex. Some people just like casual relationships or friends with benefits. Some people like one night stands. Yet, others may like monogamous relationships. Although there has been a rising stigma of older virgins, one does not have to conform to such a liberal culture if it is not what they desire.

Everyone wants something different and just because the media impresses one idea, one can act completely differently. There are seven billion people in this world, you will find someone that wants the exact same type of “relationship” as you do!

Although I wish my life was like an 80’s movie, where John Cusack is standing outside my window with a boombox, yelling for me and only me, I realize that in the Netflix and chill generation, my John Cusack might be some random frat boy that might go out of his way for me in a different aspect. Although relationships have changed, I think it is still perfectly possible to find happiness in a companionship, no matter how causal or serious.