Have you ever walked into your restroom, feeling bad about something that recently happened? Perhaps after a long and stressful day where none of the odds were in your favor. Some thoughts might have been circulating in your head about an awkward social encounter you wish could have gone better. It could have even been some anxiety that popped up for no good reason at all (as it often does). Whatever the case may have been, we’ve all taken feelings like these, packed them up within our already shattered being, and walked up to a mirror.

Every time we walk up to a mirror, an exchange takes place. We come to it asking, “Am I good enough?” For most, the answer it gives is always, “No.” This is followed by a myriad of other hurtful things that mirrors say to us, all perfectly catered to our insecurities.

“You’re too fat.”

“You’re too skinny.”

“I couldn’t have crafted an uglier mug.”

“Who’d want to be near anyone looking you?”

“That make-up won’t fix anything.”

“Everything on your face is in the wrong spot.”

These are just a few things that mirrors say to us, often

The relationships between mirrors and us have a great potential to be abusive ones. No matter what kinds of awful things they say to us, we always choose to go back to it. We always choose to hear what it has to say over to what others do. One might think that the mirror never leaves, but it always has some way to follow us. It might be in our phone’s front-facing camera. It also commonly appears in the restroom, in a puddle, within a window, and even more frighteningly, within the eyes of those we feel close to.

In this day and age, people are getting increasingly better at spreading messages of self-love and confidence. It’s just about the end of October, a month nationally recognized to be centered around messages of Anti-Bullying. You’ve no doubt come across at least a couple messages aimed at stopping the crisis of bullying: an act in which a person attempts to bring down another through hurtful words or actions. What you probably haven’t heard is that the Mirror is also a big culprit. Sometimes what it shows us isn’t a true reflection of ourselves. Sometimes it’s just a flat out lie.

“Mirrors are perpetually deceitful. They lie and steal your true self. They reveal only what your mind believes it sees”
― Dee Remy, There Once Was A Boy

It is hard to go to a mirror and not listen to it. This might be because whenever it speaks, it’s with our own voice. That’s pretty terrifying, but also downright disrespectful. To steal our voice and the true image of ourselves, we have to ask, “Why do we keep listening to this asshole?”

Dear Reader: Whatever was said to you was not true. The mirror lied. You don’t have to do anything. You’re great just the way you are.