Ah, public transportation! I imagine most of you have, at some point in your life, become (willingly or otherwise) familiar with all the fun stuff that happens on the good old bus, train, or subway line. So many interesting people to see! So much activity! Such is the hustle and bustle of the work/school day.
Except that it's not ever really a fun experience, is it? On a good day, taking public transportation to wherever your destination may be will not traumatize you. People will sit quietly, albeit angry or on guard, in their own cramped seats, trying not to make eye contact with anyone, keeping their headphones plugged firmly into their ears with music playing at a volume level that our phones warn us "can cause long-term damage." But it's worth it, isn't it? To not have to listen to other people's conversations, or to be able to play dumb when someone, despite our best efforts to look busy with whatever we're doing on our phones, still attempts to strike up a conversation.
But there are not-so-good days in the life of an environmentally-conscious traveler. And I will be the first to admit that I complain incessantly about the things I witness on my daily commute on the light rail.
For those of you not in Denver who are not familiar with the light rail, it is basically similar to a tramway, or a commuter train. Here's a picture of one for reference:
It's a simple enough concept. Here in Denver, there are several lines that take you from point A to point B in a relatively short period of time. But for the sake of clarity in this article, I'll just refer to it interchangeably with "train."
I am what my doctor describes as "hyper-vigilant." Basically, I like (or am forced to by the inner-workings of my silly brain) to be completely aware of my surroundings at all times to avoid any unexpected dangers. It may seem cool when I describe it to others, but it wreaks havoc on my poor little heart. But a result of this hyper-vigilance is my awareness of the people and things that go on around me when I'm on the train. Even with my sunglasses on (for preventing eye-contact with strangers) and headphones in (see note above about avoiding conversation), I still witness a lot. And what do we all do when we see something crazy happening in the real world? We post about it on Facebook, of course! And I post A LOT about these experiences:
Usually when people complain incessantly about something, I'm the first one to tell them to either work to change their situation, or stop bitching. But public transportation is an arena in which I'm guilty of complaining.
I don't have to take public transportation. I do own a car that runs just fine--except that the air conditioning exploded a couple of years ago, so summer pretty much sucks (#firstworldproblems) — but I am a student and an employee at MSU Denver. If you don't know, MSU Denver is a commuter campus, which basically means that there is extremely limited student housing (that I wouldn't want to live in even if it were an option for me), and the parking situation on campus is an absolute nightmare. Trying to find a parking spot on a typical day is the equivalent of stuffing a Thanksgiving turkey into a sandwich bag (ain't gon' happen). But! Tuition includes a bus pass that students can use on any bus or train. So most environment-conscious, and wallet-conscious students, myself included, opt to take advantage of that pass.
The benefit of it all is that my tirades can work to entertain my friends--many of whom insist I write a novel detailing my experiences. Well, even though there are a lot of experiences to work with, and even though I do want to be a writer, I'm not sure if my first venture into novel-length writing should be what amounts to a list of complaints about the outside world. I want to be taken seriously, dammit!
So, instead, I have decided to use this platform to provide you all with my top five most intriguing (weirdest) train experiences. Here we go!
5: You Can't Sit With Us
I remember this encounter well. I was sitting on an otherwise empty train, and she, for some reason, wanted my seat and only my seat. Maybe it had sentimental value to her? I don't know.
I usually won't sit when I'm on the train because:
A. It's too crowded a lot of the time, so it's easier to stand.
B. I want to make sure to not be that jerk that's not paying attention when a pregnant, elderly, or disabled person gets on the train. I can't look like a douche-canoe for not giving up my seat if I don't have a seat in the first place.
C. When the train is mostly empty and I do choose to sit, I will inevitably end up having someone choose to sit right next to me, despite all the available options for seating. What's up with those people?
4: DUI Whiner
This is a real conversation I overheard. The girl was complaining about having gotten on the wrong train and being late for work, but found it absolutely hilarious that she had to do this because she got her license taken away.
I simply don't have sympathy for anyone who gets a DUI, but especially not when they think it's something to brag about. Good for you! Here's your asshole award.
3: Ninja Warrior
This wasn't a complaint, really. He not only left me entertained on my way to work, but this occurrence is something I still giggle about when I think of it. I actually feel kind of bad for him.
2. T-1000
If you don't know what a T-1000 is, you haven't seen Terminator, and that is sad, but for reference, it's this guy:
This situation was funny to me for a lot of reasons. The guy had a look of complete seriousness on his face when he began chasing the train, and the way he ran was exact in form to the guy in the GIF above. It was also funny because I seemed to be the only one that noticed it — everyone around me was too focused on their phones to see it. Finally, it's funny when you know that the train doesn't stop between stations like a bus might, so if the guy was going to chase it all the way to the next stop, it was going to be a good three mile run for him. He seemed dedicated to his mission, so he probably made it.
1. Terrible Parenting
So, I know what you're thinking. This is awful. And it was. It's absolutely awful that a parent had not had the foresight to warn her kids to stay with her on or around public transportation. I don't know what came of this situation because I caught the next train that left, but I imagine I would have read a news story somewhere had the child been lost forever. I assume (at least, I really hope) that the mom learned her lesson and nothing like that will ever happen again.
So those are my top five weirdest stories. I have a lot more, but some are a bit too morbid to post, and others would be recounting incidents of harassment that I'm tired of talking about.
But ultimately, this post would be nothing but a self-serving tirade if I didn't follow up with some sort of "moral of the story" type of message, so here's what I would say:
Ultimately, unless a person on public transportation physically or emotionally harms you, it's best to reserve judgment. Everyone has their struggles, and we can't assume the worst all the time.
Crazy things happen everywhere, at any time of day, no matter what part of town you might live in. It is best to just embrace the weirdness of the world, if for nothing else than to see it as free entertainment on your journey to work or school.