Comfort zones are the most beautiful, dangerous things we can live in, especially as young adults. At a time in our life where we should be learning about who we are and who we want to become, we are not going to get answers without challenging ourselves. When I say it is important to leave home, I do not mean just leaving the physical address of the house you live in. And I do not mean leaving for good. I mean taking an opportunity to go, or live, somewhere you do not know all the answers.
I lived in the same California town for over 12 years. To say I was comfortable there, would be an understatement. Everywhere I went, whether it was the grocery store or the gas station, I would see a familiar face. I knew what to expect wherever I was around town and I had surrounded myself with the same people since I started elementary school. I loved the bubble I lived in and I was hardly concerned with what was going on outside of it.
When I was lucky enough to choose a college I wanted to attend, I decided to pack my stuff up and move across the country, 2,300 miles away. This move taught me everything about what I wanted to be. I was the most uncomfortable I had ever been and quickly realized this was not where I was meant to spend my college years. I would never call this decision a mistake (just a really expensive learning lesson) because going somewhere I did not belong, humbled me in a way I would have never imagined. Coming to the realization that I was not going to fit in everywhere or have everything handed to me, taught me valuable lessons that I have practiced every day since.
While I ended up finishing the semester at home, I would have never learned these values without this decision and the support from my parents. Being so far away from home made me realize what was truly important to me and how I could integrate it in my future.
It was only a month before I made the choice to continue my college experience in Washington. Only 662 miles away from Mom and Dad, but far enough that I get the chance to be responsible for myself to an extent. I am able to decide between right and wrong, and learn ways to take care of myself more than ever before. Leaving home has given me the amazing opportunity to meet people from around the country and appreciate different lifestyles.
It is not about making expensive learning lessons or going away for college, it is about being brave and letting go of everything that ever made you feel comfortable. Temporarily separate yourself from people you know what to expect from. Get away from an area where you know all the directions. Challenge yourself to truly expand.
The most valuable thing I have learned from leaving home roughly 9 months a year is what I want to see from myself. My parents have always led me to make informed, healthy choices, but being on my own, physically, has put me in a position where I am not being watched or tracked on the “Find Friends” app to see who’s house I am at. I feel like I can finally, fully appreciate the parents my mom and dad have always been to me and what it is like to not have them next to me on a day where I feel like I need them physically present. Family time has taken on a whole new role in my life now that it has become so limited.
Leaving home is critical for self-growth, there are some things we truly cannot learn until we experience them firsthand.